wizzardly: (The flaw in the argument)
Rincewind ([personal profile] wizzardly) wrote in [community profile] maskormenace2017-03-17 12:15 am

video; [3/15, TW for murder most foul]

[Happy Ides, everyone. To celebrate, here's a pale, shaken wizzard on your screen, standing in some nondescript Maurtia Falls allet. If the pallor of his skin makes him look a person who may be ill, that's probably because he is. Or at least was. Barely thirty seconds ago, violently, behind a trash can.]

Once, just once I'd like to go a month without - without the streets flooding with ghosts, or being in ridiculous brawls in bars with bears, or being kidnapped, or - or -

[Rincewind breaks off with a pained, miserable expression, glancing back over his shoulder. As he does so, the video shifts enough to show a dumpster with its lid open, a bag of trash abandoned outside it. The angle makes it impossible to see inside.]

...There's a body in there. Two, er, halves of one. Someone's, um...

[Rincewind swallows thickly, fighting another wave of nausea.]

I don't think she's an imPort. ...Was. Gods.

Look - someone come deal with this, will you? That's what you heroes are meant to do, right? So one of you needs to bloody well get out here. I'm not - I can't - this isn't my responsibility.
slightlyoffchilt: (Cynosure.)

voice;

[personal profile] slightlyoffchilt 2017-03-17 04:22 am (UTC)(link)
Dear god, Rincewind, are you all right?

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infomodder: and i would know about awkward (dude awkward)

voice;

[personal profile] infomodder 2017-03-17 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
[Oh boy.]

Have you called the police?

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helpline: (yeah i'm confused)

video;

[personal profile] helpline 2017-03-17 04:36 am (UTC)(link)
Two halves? That's unexpected. [ it's either one very dedicated serial killer or some space bullshit.

and because even the Doctor knows "hey, PROBABLY SHOULDN'T ASK THIS DUDE about the state of the body"
] Shoot me the address and someone responsible'll be on the way.

[ or the Doctor. either/or ]

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neverdied: (54)

text;

[personal profile] neverdied 2017-03-17 05:09 am (UTC)(link)
Is it fresh?

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heckblazer: (meh)

Text;

[personal profile] heckblazer 2017-03-17 06:40 am (UTC)(link)
Tough break. How'd they end up in half? Magic trick gone wrong?

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exceptfebruary: calendar man shadowed, playing with his lip (This Is Halloween)

voice;

[personal profile] exceptfebruary 2017-03-17 02:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Beware the Ides of March.
itistolaugh: that lift and separate. (I'm not ashamed to wear pants)

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[personal profile] itistolaugh 2017-03-17 06:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Julie, you didn't! Did you?

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itistolaugh: It's either WOMEEEEN or MEEEEEN. (The Kobayashi Maru of massages.)

voice;

[personal profile] itistolaugh 2017-03-17 03:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Wow, gross.

[She's not, like, the best at empathy. Or tact.]

Where are you? I'll come wait with you for someone competent to show up.

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h2no: (AND BURIED DEEP AWAY)

audio

[personal profile] h2no 2017-03-17 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)
[a murder? what the fuck yo]

Shit... look, it seems like there's gonna be people comin' to move the, uh. Affected. D'you need a hand?

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rathercommon: (unsympathetic (maybe sympathetic))

video

[personal profile] rathercommon 2017-03-17 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh. Oh, Rincewind...

[ Kitty's voice is soft and sympathetic. ]

Why don't you come to mine? Have a cup of tea?

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alcheregis: (bending within each other's atmosphere)

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[personal profile] alcheregis 2017-03-18 12:26 am (UTC)(link)
Deal with it how? Even a genessi like myself can't put her back together in that state. Are they at least well-proportioned halves?

[ Priorities?? ]

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am_i_a_monster: (Default)

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[personal profile] am_i_a_monster 2017-03-18 01:27 am (UTC)(link)
Don't touch what's left of her. You should go and let the cops or an ambulance handle it.

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idesof: no slutshaming (eggnog wheatgrass)

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[personal profile] idesof 2017-03-18 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
[Behind his desk looking like he's been there all night, stripped down to shirt and suspenders, and also he is so horrified!!!]

A body? My God!

[SO HORRIFIED POOR RINCEWIND]

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postcog: (z06)

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[personal profile] postcog 2017-03-19 09:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Where? I should be able to at least make sure it's the two halves of the same person, and if it's been recently deceased maybe get some answers out of it.

[ She hasn't tested it here, but it's worth a shot. ]

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hellosirs: (hmm)

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[personal profile] hellosirs 2017-03-20 03:49 am (UTC)(link)
Try to stay calm, sir! Have you called the local police and/or militia?

[ As the Greatest Detective in the World (his world, anyway), Angus has some experience with murder scenes and freaked out witnesses. More experience than an 11-year-old boy should have, maybe, but the point is that he knows what to do in these kinds of situations! ]

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thevictoriandetective: (We had chips.)

Video

[personal profile] thevictoriandetective 2017-03-20 09:07 am (UTC)(link)
[He's delighted.]

This might actually be good. Point your camera towards the body. Show me everything. If this is half as interesting as you're proposing, I might even come to have a look.

[Sherlock seems to be ignoring or not seeing the emotional state of said body-finder person.]

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baetiful: ([ 06 ])

voice;

[personal profile] baetiful 2017-03-21 10:39 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Gosh, Rincewind. Stop bringing negative attention to Maurtia Falls! ]

Not that it excuses the fact that it was there, but why were you going through the garbage?

[ Sure seems like Rincewind was just looking for trouble with that one. Or he put it there. ]

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