maskormenace | [04] Voice

[ So even though the feed opens up, Walt doesn't talk for a moment or so. There's a sharp inhale and it's accompanied by a piteous cough. And then after a couple minute pause, he starts talking -- sounding rather relaxed. ]

Today was my birthday.

[ A beat. Nonchalant. ]

But it's also my death anniversary. How many people can say that? Their life came a full and complete circle, starting and ending all on the same day? I mean, what are the chances? Pretty crazy, that.

[ Another brief pause. Another follow up cough. When he speaks, his voice is a little strained. ]

I mean like, this whole world. What an insane concept, right? To think that our own individual worlds are just this tiny fraction of all the different worlds out there -- some with crazy powers or vampires or Satan. We have Satan. Does anyone ever stop to think about that? How Satan has a TV show? I mean, I guess...what a better way to say welcome to hell than Satan with his own TV show. I've never actually watched it, mind. But I imagine it probably involves burning people alive.

But following that thought -- I still think this place is hell. I mean, I can't be the only dead guy walking here, can I? And it's definitely not heaven. My therapist called it purgatory once.

[ A beat. ]

Purgatory is kind of accurate. Sometimes he knows what he's talking about. All of us just sitting here and waiting -- to either go home and die for good or to do whatever it is we do here. I mean, we can't die. There's a definite statistical likelihood that we come back to life if we get killed, so do we age? I'm 53 today, but am I not really 53? Am I eternally 52 until I die again? Do I die again? Or do I just live an endless loop of my life -- dying, coming here, dying coming here until some otherworldly being makes up their mind?

Maybe that's what Satan's show is about. Collecting as many of us that belong in hell and dragging us back with him. That's a pretty morbid thought, isn't it?

[ So why is Walt laughing. Why is Walt laughing like it's the most hilarious thing in the world? Why is he laughing at all? What was he laughing at again?

The laughter dies. ]

What was I talking about again? [ But it's lost. ] Anyway, I just want to know. Is there anyone else out there who died? Bonus if you died on your birthday. Might be good to talk about it. Therapeutic. And I'm here to listen. We can talk here or in person. If anyone wants to go with me to get birthdeath day breakfast for dinner, that could be a thing. That we do.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Shut up. We're family of course I got you something. And you know I'm here if you need to talk.

[ About being a lying killing scumbag. ]

I know, Hank. I just don't want to burden you with my problems. Haven't I done enough of that already?

Maybe I can burden you with some of mine. Make it a little more even.
Just don't forget to drop by or I'll have to worry and find your ass.

I wouldn't miss it.

I've missed you. Missed talking to you lately.

Work's been a nightmare is all. You know how it can get. We'll make up for it, don't worry.

[ The conversation dies for a little while -- after Jesse's thrown Walt's communicator to the side and convinced him to stay. And when he finally gets the chance to get back to it: ]

Sorry, I don't think I'm going to make it back to Heropa tonight after all.

[ The devil has nothing to hide, even poking his nose into Walt's life. I mean, really, just try and stop him. ]

I didn't realize Walter had family here. How fortunate for him. Are you very close?

[ Hank knows a troll when he sees one. But what's one supposed to say to someone pretending they're Lucifer? ]

Maybe that's cause it's none of your business. You want something? I charge for an autograph.

I'd pay for one.

[ Are you really going to tease the devil about signing things, Hank? ]

Really, there's no need to be hostile. We could talk on other matters if you prefer, leave Walt out of the conversation entirely. It's you I'm interested in.

Oh yeah? Is it my pretty smile?

Edited 2015-09-15 17:48 (UTC)

I'm a family man. I have brothers, and my relationship with them - the loss of it - has always been my deepest regret.

But let's say it's your smile.

So what, you trying to bond with all the imPort 'brothers' out there? Sounds like you need a shrink. Your family issues aren't my problem and my family's none of your business.

Try a better pick-up line if you wanna make me weak in the knees.

Oh no. A pick up line? On this thing? No--I may be accused of being responsible for sexting but it's not really my thing. I prefer to do most of my flirting in person.

You know, there's no need to be so defensive. Someone might think you were actually afraid of me.

[04] Voice

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