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[cigarbribery]

So, hi!

[The setting: an ice cream parlor, somewhere in Heropa. The scene: Foggy Nelson, eating ice cream, because somebody offered him free ice cream with toppings and he's broke. He gives the camera a little wave and a friendly grin.]

I'm Foggy Nelson—yeah, I know, not my idea, but I'm not changing it now—and I have some questions. Don't worry, I got the "welcome to another world, you have superpowers" speech, I just have some concerns it didn't address.

[Lots and lots of them, actually, but he'll just start with the most pressing.]

First of all, I'm a lawyer back at home. Got a law firm and a partner and even a sign for our office. [A pause, during which he looks quickly away from the camera and lets out a quiet, tired sigh like he's already missing it, then:] Of course, you don't have any reason to believe me, and I don't have any proof to back me up here. Which leads me to my first question: do my qualifications still carry over into an alternate universe? Because, man, being an insurance claim investigator is the only thing that's probably worse than being a lawyer. [He's both, so he gets to be funny about this.]

Second, I might need a crash course on imPort law. I'm pretty sure immigration law doesn't quite cover "forcibly dragged to another universe" that well, and I only got maybe a sketch of the benefits of registration when I tried to ask. [This whole registration thing honestly comes off as a little sketchy to Foggy, but he's going to keep his trap shut on that much.]

Third—does anyone here know what I mean when I say the Avengers? How about the Incident? I—just need to know.

Comments

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[aggressiveapathy]

Avengers people go to the back of the line. Sorry. Just the law.

Feel lucky. Gotham people get voted off the island.

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[cigarbribery]

Technically I'm not with the Avengers, I just happen to live in the same area. Can I keep my place at the front of the line?

Yeah, I'm such a lucky guy. [He can be a little bit bitter about being dragged across universes, okay, he's allowed.]

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[hardedged]

[ there's a pause from her end. jessica wasn't planning to respond. she's dealt with enough lawyers back home. (well, technically only one, but hogarth was plenty.) there aren't many posts on the network that tend to grasp her attention, though his last inquiry changes that. ]

What about 'em?

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[cigarbribery]

You know them? [There's hope in his voice, because he'd kind of resigned himself to being the only one here from his New York—the last question had been a shot in the dark.] I just wanted to see how many of us were from the same world, that's all. The Avengers were the first thing I could think of.

[wordaday]

[Ah, yes, it's that time of month again. She always feels so bad for the new people, she remembers how rattled she was to be here the first time.

This guy seems pretty cheery, though, all things considered. Huh.]

Well, the government seems kinda lenient [Hey, the word-a-day calendar word from last Friday!] on imPorts when it comes to things like qualifications. I'm sure you'll be good. And as for the last question, never heard of it. Sorry.

[Have a sympathetic smile, Foggy.]

[cigarbribery]

How lenient, exactly? Can I just quit my job right now and start a law firm today, or do I need to pass the bar here first? [A beat.] Again.

[nooooooooooooo]

It's fine. I was just throwing it out there to see if there was anybody else who recognized it.

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[reek]

I can think of a great deal of incidents.

[ Hey, Foggy. Meet your flatmate. He's a smartass, and he's smirking like one. ]

I'll even be so kind as to offer you a choice. Which would you like to hear about first? The blackout? Or perhaps the one with the phantoms? There have been others, as well.

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[cigarbribery]

Nah, I was talking about the one with the giant space whales. Unless there's giant space whales here too.

[Honestly, he wouldn't be surprised. But—incidents, plural. That's interesting and concerning, and Foggy leans forward.]

But since we're on the subject—I don't really need specifics, I just want to know: do these incidents happen regularly?

Permavid

[governorkang]

[Is this a person that looks a lot like a dragon? Yes, it is.]

I don't know if they're experts on imPort law, but DeKath and West Law Office helps explain US law to imPorts who are new to it, and they will help to smooth out minor legal issues. They might even accept off-world qualifications such as yours.

[cigarbribery]

['scuse him, he's just going to stare at the screen for a moment as if he's not quite sure what the hell is even going on here anymore. Is that a dragon? Is that a talking dragon? What the hell.

Then he shakes his head.]

Duly noted. I don't know how the legal system here works, anyway, not for sure, and I could use a crash course. [Especially not when it comes to imPorts.] Somehow I kinda doubt that, seeing as I didn't think to bring along my diploma just in case I got yanked to another world, but I'll give it a try anyway.

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[youresovein]

Even a sign! You must have done very well for yourself.

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[cigarbribery]

Really well, thanks. [The cheer fades a little, when he adds:] And then I ended up here, so.

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[ghoulking]

People often believe imPorts' qualifications, however some may not take them serious, which is why most undergo actual exams in order to have a legal document to prove of their abilities. [ so there you might want to re-take that Bar exam, Foggy ]

And "Avengers" have been here, perhaps some still are - a team of imPorts from the same world. I can't tell you much more. [ because then he'd be accused of stalking people and that's not a good first impression )= ]

[video]

[cigarbribery]

One more reason for me to take the bar again, I guess. [He looks and sounds distinctly sour about it, shaking his head as if he really wishes he didn't have to go through that again. Seriously, the first time had been hellish enough.

His face considerably brightens. Hey, there are people from his world here! He's not the only one!]

No, you can tell me—I'm from the same world they are. [He hasn't learned yet about the existence of the Avengers on multiple worlds.] They're here? You've met them?

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[khajidont]

You've gotta take the bar again, but they won't make you go any mandatory classes, or anything. If you talk a little about the kind of world you're from, they might set you up with someone to walk you through some of the laws you probably don't know about. Until then... honestly, man, I have seen so many jobs worse than insurance claims investigator. I'd hold onto that one until you pass.

[ He pauses. ]

Also, I've heard of the Avengers, even if they're not from my world - we got our own superhero team - but I'm not sure if any of them are actually here. Except for Mr. Stark, technically, but he's really more of a businessman here.

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[cigarbribery]

Oh, good, I was hoping I wouldn't have to go back to class again. I'm in enough debt as it is. [Back in New York, anyway.] It's nice to know all I have to worry about again is passing the bar. And getting enough capital to start my own firm. And hiring employees. And finding an office. And—well, you get the picture.

[Yeah, he'll probably have to keep that insurance claims investigator job, won't he. He can already imagine how people are going to react.]

Tony Stark's here? And—yeah, he is a businessman, he has his own company back in New York. [A little, slightly unimpressed huff.] Honestly, I wish I were more surprised he somehow managed to open a branch a universe over.

[chulk]

Dude, you have to be more specific when you say 'the Incident'. [He even does the airquotes.]

The Avengers have been involved in a lot of incidents.

[cigarbribery]

There's more than just the one now?

[He sounds more or less resigned to this. Yep, the Avengers have apparently gotten involved in yet more incidents while Foggy wasn't looking, that's a thing now. He hopes to god they stayed away from Hell's Kitchen.]

The first one—portal over New York? Giant space whales and aliens straight out of a crappy sci-fi movie? That one.

[ret2go]

Sorry, I'm not really gonna be of any help. From what I can tell, the law back home just deals with beating up pirates who try and plunder your town.

[cigarbribery]

—seriously? That's it? Don't you have due process, a court, a jail, something?

[He is so outraged by this it's a little hypocritical, considering his best friend and business partner's side hobby.]

[divaricate]

You should be able to take a bar exam here to get credentials. And uh, I'm an Avenger back in my world, but I don't know if we're from the same world -- does Sokovia mean anything to you? [Sokovia apparently doesn't exist or something in some of the other universes she's met Avenger-type people from.]

[cigarbribery]

Yeah, I figured. Thanks, that's the best news I've heard all day. [He squints at her. He doesn't recognize her, he's pretty sure she wasn't among the Avengers during the Incident, but considering what the kid said about the Avengers being involved in future incidents—

Well, he believes her, anyway.]

That's a small country in—Eastern Europe, right? [At his point, nothing's happened to it just yet. His brow furrows a little.] What happened to it?

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[storyseeker]

What kind of lawyer were you?

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[cigarbribery]

I was a criminal defense attorney. I also dabbled in other things, my partner and I just established our firm, but first and foremost? Criminal defense.

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[handycapable]

You'd think that for everything else they managed to pull off about bringing us here, the least they could do is also provide some sorta background check so that this wouldn't be an issue. I mean, personally I don't really mind trying on something new for a while as long as I'm here, but I'd hate to be one of those people who sank twenty or thirty years into their career only to have it mean nothing now.

[ Not that Ray wasn't invested at least a decade's worth of time in his own career, but honestly... he really doesn't mind doing something else at least for a little while. A break sounds pretty nice. ]

So, "Foggy"... is that short for something?

[cigarbribery]

Right? I did hear that a few employers just take it on faith that we're telling the truth, but that's not exactly feasible for me. [So it's back to hitting the books in hopes of passing the bar, again.] Honestly, if the Porter can bring people here, it could at least have the decency to bring in something so we could back up our claims.

[Ah, yes. Foggy sighs.]

I snore like a foghorn, apparently. [He shakes his head slightly, as if he doesn't quite believe it himself.] It just got shortened to "Foggy" over time. My real name's Franklin, but only my parents call me that now.

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[pillz]

hey
i had an import lawyer who did the same job back in his homeworld. he got me out of jail this one time and into a rehab program.
which was maybe worse, depending who you ask. cleaned my ass up though.
you gotten any bites on avengers or incidents?

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[cigarbribery]

That's kind of a lawyer's job. We look out for the best deal for our clients. Ideally, anyway.

[cough, Landman & Zack, cough, Matt Murdock, cough]

Who was your lawyer? I'd like to talk to them.

Yeah, lots. Why, you're biting too?

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[liverletdie]

Number one: Easily doable.
Number two: Also probably doable.
Number three: Yes and no.

Probably an alternate universe issue. [ A beat. ] Nice to see you again, by the way.

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[cigarbribery]

Thanks for the info. Uh.

[He blinks at the man on the screen. Yes, that is definitely Tony Stark on his screen, but it's an older version from the one Foggy's used to seeing on TV and in the tabloids. An alternate universe thing, huh?

—wait a moment.]

Have we met, Mr. Stark? [As polite as it is, there's a certain guarded quality to Foggy's voice, like he's not too sure how to go about talking to an alternate universe version of Iron Man.]

[morethan084]

[Daisy isn't really interested in yet another introduction video until he mentions the "Incident". He isn't someone she recognizes back home, but he knows about what happened in New York. He also knows the Avengers.]

Not too often you hear them mentioned here, but, yes. I know who the Avengers are. Also witnessed 'the Incident' first hand.

[cigarbribery]

[Foggy lets out a relieved breath. He's just glad there's people from his world, weirdly enough—it makes him feel a little less alone, in this strange new world.]

Oh, good, for a minute there I thought—

[He stops, and changes track:] So, um. How long have you been here?

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[backin_theworld]

[ Never have two words caught Caps attention faster than these two did and though he got stuck having to finish his shoot (Yes, Captain America was a pin-up model) it wasn't too long after that he sent a message Foggy's way. ]

Can't help you out with the first and second questions but that last one I know both. Pretty well, actually.

Why do you need to know?

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[cigarbribery]

[AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Stay cool Foggy stay cool]

Reasons. [No, too vague. Foggy shrugs, a little.] And honestly, I'm trying to see how many of us from New York—our New York—are here.