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[Good morning, Heropa. Greeting you today is a man with a bright smile and an even brighter shirt — aqua, with a tie that seems to match only in theory — and a look in his eye that twinkles with confidence and certainty. Yes, here is a man who is not at all questioning this place and its motives; here is a man who is totally okay with the situation in which he's found himself; here is a man who is a very good, very convincing faker.]

Greetings and salutations, fellow ImPorts! Allow me to introduce myself: Saul Goodman, attorney at law and soon-to-be judge. I want you all to be able to think of me as a resource — as someone whose purpose here is to assist where and when I can, at least as far as legal issues are concerned. For consultation purposes only, though; I won't... uh, really have the time to open my own practice here, unfortunately.

[And that does seem like something that upsets him, but he allows that emotion in for all of two seconds before dismissing it and focusing back on sounding genuine and honest. Which he is, to some degree. It's just... kind of rare, is all. But this is what happens when you don't want to upset your kidnappers: You do what you think you have to.]

Anyway, I'm gonna have to spend some time catching up on what's actually going on in this place, legally and politically speaking. There are other lawyers and legal professional-types around, right? We should chat. Oh, and for all you daytime TV-watchers —

[THERE THEY ARE. THE FINGERGUNS.]

Get used to seeing this face.

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[Well, he's nicely dressed, tie or not. Gamagori can appreciate that. A man in a suit deserves some degree of respect, not only that but Saul is also older and introducing himself properly, so points all around. Not that Gamagori looks pleased, him always as a scowl and pose. Looks intimidating enough, like he could easily drag five grown men out of a car and then beat them with it. All while wearing that rather interessing but equally impressive gold and black spiked uniform.]

Hello, Mr. Goodman. I am Gamagori Ira, registered imPort and Cape Canaveral Bootcamp Instructor, pleased to meet you, and welcome- despite the inconvenience- to this version of the United States.

[A thoughtful pause, his face looking a bit more his age now, younger, as he goes from stern to thoughtful and slightly perplexed.]

If I heard right, you were saying you would be both a judge- and on daytime television?

Daytime TV? What, don't tell me they cast you in The Bold and the Beautiful.

Prosecution or defense? [ because Freddie has very mixed lawyer opinions cause lol, she's been sued out the whoa. ]

Nice tie, by the way.

A judge?

[ Hear the utter dubiousness in Joel's strong Texan accent there. ]

[ Daytime TV-watchers.... ]

Why, was your assigned job to star in a soap or something?

[ All he got was 'Informercial Voiceover Actor'. ]

[ When Bader is bored she likes to assign other imPorts to what clan they would belong to if they were Embraced. This asshole has Toreador that catches himself too many times in the mirror like an overstimulated parakeet written all over him. ]

Don't you have to be elected for that?

[WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE]

There are quite a few legal professional types around here. [NO REALLY WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THIS POST] Nice tie.

[Well, this guy's a special snowflake, isn't he? He can't really be okay with all this, can he? Maybe so. Maybe he's prepared for it. Who knows? People come from all sorts of places around here.

Isaac can be helpful, though!]

I've met a few lawyers around here, yeah. ImPorts, too.

[ now not only is she effectively deaf in one ear, but she is blind. and still manages, in an incredibly sincere tone: ] I like your suit.

[ she does not. actually she likes the tie, but as her palette tends towards woodsy and jewel colors and not.... a dolphin tank, the suit is a lot to take in. and still she looks like she means it with her wide, guileless eyes. sincerest teenager in the history of teenagers. ]

Edited 2014-09-03 17:31 (UTC)

A daytime TV show doesn't make you a real judge. Did you even take the bar exam here?

[The three year old girl is throwing some pretty harsh shade.]

I can't believe you said salutations, your name is Saul, and you didn't do something cooler.

[Saulutations... fucking newbies.]

And seriously? You do law stuff?

It doesn't bother you at all, huh? [ What is it with this place and lawyers? ] This whole set-up, it doesn't bother you.

[Oh. What a truly charming human being. He can barely resist flinching at those fashion choices.]

It's good to see someone here have high aspirations and ambitions for their future. It's refreshing.

What's your new job?

I'm a psychiatrist, and one that specializes in abnormal psychiatry. I've done consultant work, before, in court.

[Like exactly one time.]

Doctor Frederick Chilton. Pleasure.

Hm. That's impressive. I can't recall the last time I felt like punching someone in the face so quickly after meeting them.

A TV judge, is it? Well, let me tell you: you're going to need a better suit than that.

are you gonna be like judge judy

Soon-to-be judge? Is that what they assigned you here?

[ He makes a note on something off-screen, mostly just keeping track of another new lawyer entering the fold. Helps to know. ]

Trust me, fella, you might have a lot more time than you're expecting.

Edited 2014-09-04 04:26 (UTC)

You're a judge here? I only wish. I mean, I'm intending to study towards being a lawyer myself. Though that's kinda....messed with here and all. Mr Edgeworth has helped me in trying to get some experience with the field at least. I know him and I've talked to Kay as well. She's still in training, but those are two names I have for you?

Wow, this place sure loves lawyers. Nice to meet you, Mr. Goodman! I'm Kay Faraday - Great Thief Yatagarasu and juror-in-training with Teen Court!

[YES SHE DID JUST CALL HERSELF A THIEF.]

A TV lawyer. Quite the qualification.

[ He was all for carrying on with his life, but the finger guns make him nostalgic for home, don't mind him. Fraser is not in uniform, however; Florida is way too hot, the sequel. ]

Your name is really Saul Goodman?

[amazing.]

So what's your catch-phrase going t' be?

You do realize you aren't obligated to do the job they give you, right?

[Not that Kate's encouraging him to do the lawyer thing.

In fact, she thinks it's great that he isn't, but she doesn't know that he trusts him to keep away from it.

He is Saul Goodman, after all.]

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