001↑ VIDEO

[tooscience]

[See a dinosaur in a vest. See a dinosaur in a vest talking. Just a normal day.]

PRIMITIVE MEAT PESTS ON THIS SORRY EXCUSE FOR A VINE/TWITTER ABOMINATION! I REQUIRE YOU BRING TO ME ALL OF YOUR CRYSTALS!

[Yelling. Definitely yelling and not talking.]

I AM NEW AND CLEARLY IN NEED OF AID!

[He pauses a moment to glance at some papers before looking back up at the camera.]

Mime? MIME IS NOT A JOB! MIMES DON'T DO SCIENCE! Have you mammals changed your mammaly words again?! Is this some hipster thing?!

I DEMAND SOMEONE TRADE WITH ME!

Comments

Video;

[tooscience]

Yes, assist me, insignificant mammal! Help won't at all end in horrible mammalian bloodshed! I'm nice like that.

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

[The only thing that's keeping him from putting a weapon to his head is simply his SHIELD experience.

He presses his lips together]

Tell me what you desire. And I'll help you. but yelling at people here won't get you help. It will make them angry, and there are more mammals so far then dinosaurs. It's a ...[deep breath] terrible shame.

Video;

[tooscience]

YES IT IS! SAURIAN RULE WILL COME AGAIN FOR WHAT YOU MAMMALS DID TO US!

...

[Could this be mammal trickery? Maybe. But he's too smart, he'd know if this mammal was going to try anything.]

CRYSTALS! I NEED CRYSTALS! And maybe a couple nukes. Actually ten. I want crystals and ten nukes. Oh, and two computers and a car!

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

Sure. What we did to you.

[It's hard not to slip back into cop mode, into agent mode with someone who is...insane.

It's hard to keep your sanity when staring at a dinosaur that wants a nuclear weapon]

Nukes can't happen. Computers maybe. Crystals will...as long as you promise not to hurt anyone here.

[Look at him being all noble.] Just tell me what kind you need.

Video;

[tooscience]

I'm not going to hurt anyone, I'm just going to change time so that mammals never existed.

[Duh. All mammals are going to die. That's not hurting anyone, they're just mammals.]

All of them. I need all crystals.

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

[Pause.

Ok.] Building a time machine?

[What has his life become]

Video;

[tooscience]

Is there a better way for a time traveler to change time? YES! It's called a time bomb!

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

[dinosaur why.]

...Ok.

[Well.

It could be useful.]

what's your name? My name's Ward.

Video;

[tooscience]

Dr. Dinosaur, super genius and better than all mammals!

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

It's an honor to meet you.

[He'll say thanks to all of the times he's met kissing Asgardian ass]

You want Crystals to build a time bomb. Where can I deliver them to you?

Video;

[tooscience]

[He takes a moment to look over those papers again.]

Residence twelve.

[Giving people your home address? Totally okay.]

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

[Good job dinosaur. Ward nods]

I'll bring you some. I'll help you.

But you gotta do something for me first Mr. Dinosaur.

Video;

[tooscience]

Doctor. What do you want half-ape?

Re: Video;

[hydraated]

[BUY TIME.]

...Set a date.

Set a date for the time bomb. I'll bring you crystal things - but set a date for it. we half apes like dates.

[Why. Why does he care.]

Important dates.

Like Christmas. Or new years. Gives me time to say goodbye to loved ones since I'll be exploded.

Video;

[tooscience]

You won't explode. You'll just never have existed.

Video; Private

[hydraated]

[Ward is first and foremost a spy.

This is first and foremost a dinosaur. Even if he's babbling, he can at least...try.

Sort out his feelings later. He can work with this. Grant Ward, spy, friend to the weird.]

See that button? That's a private button. It means only you and I can see it.

We deserve it. We deserve, not to exist, but you gotta prove you're better then us. Us Mammals...we'd just - make everyone vanish right away. The civilized thing to do is make people dangle. Squirm.

Give me a timetable.

[And then what will you do with it Ward?]

Video; Private

[tooscience]

I am a genius, half-ape! I know what buttons do! Your iPhones are nothing new to me!

Hmmmmm... When I get all that I need, then you can have your useless timetable!

Re: Video; Private

[hydraated]

[Awesome. Great.]

Then you get your crystals. Lots of them.

[watch, Ward will rob a new age store as soon as he finds one] Any color?

Video; Private

[tooscience]

[H'ssssk taps his chin for a moment before speaking.]

Yellow! Maybe some blue... Red too! And some orange and green.