video

[performance]

[ SOME NERD is addressing the network today, dressed for fall with a fashionable blue scarf and sipping a cup of coffee. It's been a while. He's feeling chatty. ]

Question! Are there any responsible-ish pseudo-adult figures out there who'd be willing to give driving lessons? Someone — hint, it's me — is turning sixteen in December. Time flies! And I'd also like to fly. Ideally in a hover car. Ideally-er without crashing it into a tree.

Not-question: welcome, newbies! I'm Dick Grayson. I'm a Sagittarius, I like long walks on the beach, computer programming, and electronics repair, I'm totally available for math tutoring, and I microwave a mean Hot Pocket.

And I've been here for about a year and a half, so if you need any questions answered, I can try really, really hard to give you more than just a giant question mark in response, but... well, there are still a lot of question marks. So here are a few quick answers to some common questions. Yes, this is actually happening, no, we don't know what the deal with the Porter is, yes, you really have superpowers now, and no, you don't have to put on a cape. But I totally support you if you do. You're doing important work, and almost everyone looks good in a cape. Science fact.

Comments

[liverletdie]

You know, I invented flying cars where I'm from.

So I'm kind of the expert.

[performance]

What? You're the Henry Ford of hovercars? You never said!

video

[huntergames]

[ She could wait until they've met up, but... ]

Noooooooo!

[performance]

[ OH GOD ]

What? What did I do?

video;

[rassera]

You had me right until you said 'hover'.

[And 'car', but hover came first in the sentence.]

video;

[performance]

What, afraid of very small heights?

video.

[tardily]

You don't have to drive when you turn sixteen you know.

[ ...barry you have superspeed and central city is apparently small enough for you to run to work.

you really wanna go with that? ]

[performance]

Okay, yeah, but why wouldn't I want to?

[ text ]

[bestversion]

we should make a faq

[performance]

You know, I think there was one, but it's kind of outdated.
Maybe there should be a friendlier one, anyway.

With tips for designing your own superhero costume.

[Voice]

[thegriffinofdeath]

Oh I think it's working...hmm.

[There's a pause.]

You know, I've always found cloaks are far better than capes.

[Anastasya is basically using him as an excuse to practice with her comm. Oops?]

permavid

[performance]

Why's that? Big fan of hoods?

video;

[sidecars]

Gosh, the one thing I don't have a license for. Lemme know how it goes, though! If you find someone to teach you, that is...

[ Also, don't listen to Stark. Bucky's been waiting for those hover cars since his papa was in charge! ]

[performance]

What do you mean, the one thing?

[video]

[timecapture]

It's nice that there are so many people willing to help. I'm Max. I'm a Virgo. [Hey, he started it.] I love art, and I could seriously use some math help. [Because not every socially awkward dork is good at that stuff.] Congrats on your future birthday.

Is there a way I can register and not have to put on a cape or something? I don't mind helping, but I'd make a terrible superhero. [Not mentioning that she already had superpowers to begin with, nope.]

[performance]

Hi, Max! Nice to meet you. Don't worry — I'm registered and I don't do any of that stuff. It more or less just means that you're agreeing to play by the rules while you're here. No one's ever been forced to do anything.

text;

[timeframes]

bad news dude
theres only room for one hot pocket master chef with a sweet cape who was born under the sign of a muscular horseman in this town
so i guess that means i have to leave

text;

[performance]

Wow, really?
Giving up without a fight? Just like that?

[resipiscent]

Covering all the bases at once with that introduction, I see.

[performance]

I like to be thorough. It cuts down on future awkwardness.

[dormition]

I'm not exactly an adult yet, but I learned how to drive this year and it went okay. If there's no one else better qualified that offers, I wouldn't mind teaching you.

Shinjiro-senpai has a car we could borrow.

[performance]

I haven't gotten any offers yet! That's really nice of you — you sure you wouldn't mind?

[orions_shadow]

I dunno about important work, or maybe I just grew up in hopeless land.

Also, scientific fact? Doncha' think capes are impractical? You had to earn the right to wear em in my world. Status symbol.

[performance]

There's lots of practical uses for a cape. Camouflage, breaking up a silhouette, emergency blanket, looking awesome...

video; private

[andaway]

First time I tried to teach you how to drive we nearly crashed the Batmobile.

I mean, I'm just saying.

video; private

[performance]

[ His eyes go wide with surprise, but then he laughs. ]

Only nearly?

video

[112ounces]

I'm mostly caught up on most of my classes, but I still need math tutoring.

[performance]

Then I'd be happy to help! I don't charge or anything, but I do accept bribes in the form of cookies.

video; private; let's try that again...

[chiroptophobic]

Just so you know, if you get driving lessons from Stark I may actually cry.

video; private; thanks satan

[performance]

Strangely enough, he hasn't offered! Go figure.