maskormenace | 1 ♠ [ video ]

[ Armstrong knows he can't just blindly advertise himself and his powers on this network. After all, to his understanding, anyone can be looking at this and he's not exactly sure what impact his actions could have on the public. With that, he's going to just post a harmless message that will garner the attention he needs from possible comrades and, hopefully, charm others into talking to him…. with his body.

His Hawaiian, pink floral print with tropical trees (decorated down to the last detail! There are coconuts with happy faces!) shirt rips revealing a diamond-cut physique that shines with sparkles as he flexes in multiple positions. ] Hmph! I am Alex Louis Armstrong! And it appears that I have been sent here for reasons that are similar to your origin in this heroic land! [ His shirt reforms, this time, the Hawaiian shirt is green and has turtles with sunglasses. ] It will be an honor to serve alongside all of you and I wish many successes upon you in hopes that, one day, you will develop a perfect muscular system just like mine! [ RIP. Another shirt explodes and drifts into pieces as he makes some super sexy playmate endorsed poses to demonstrate his upper body girth. A new shirt forms, replacing the old one with a standard white Hawaiian shirts with red cartoonish crabs. ] If anyone would like help developing their body, please do not hesitate to give me a call! Honing these intense muscles have been a trait passed down the Armstrong family line for generations!

[ Heropa, you may pour yourself a drink right at this very moment. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ A small tear just kinda drops from his right eye. What a beautiful story. ]

So you mean, she'll refuse to abandon him even if he's just string because of love?! What a touching, amazing story! I can't believe such romance can exist in this world! [ The single tear turns into just two noisy fire hydrants. ]

I will accept my second best! I cannot compete with love and school uniforms!

One time, Senketsu-chan was torn apart in battle, and Ryuuko-chan traveled all the way to Osaka to collect all the missing pieces!

[nodnod] There is no truer love than that between a girl and her outfit!

Wow! That's such dedication and such beautiful romantic love! If the pieces were to be ripped again, do not hesitate to enlist me in collecting them! I will make sure this girl and her outfit continue to thrive in their own world together! [ True love makes him weepy. Super weepy. ] My heart simply warms with pride to know that there is another world and a place where someone can continue to love someone despite being an inanimate object! [ Armstrong has some familiarity with this circumstance. ]

I'm sure Ryuuko-chan would appreciate your help, Armstrong-san! Senketsu, too!

[hm...] Are there people who love inanimate objects in your world, Armstrong-san?

Yes. [ He smiles quite warmly. ] Although, the object, like in the case of Ryuuko and Senketsu, is actually a person. We all care for him, very much. [ He'll remain tighter lipped about this. ] However, maybe unlike your case, it could be possible to change him back and that is his goal. We all still care for him like a person, because that's exactly what he is.

He's very lucky to have people who love him so much. [She won't press the subject farther.] That's very important, after all! Even in a world of superheroes, you still need people to care for you, and people to care about in return. Otherwise, why even bother with any of it in the first place?

I wish other people had your sensibilities. May I ask for your name? [ There's a genuine, heartfelt smile. It's not the over the top, bombastic, LOOK AT MY TEETH thing he usually has going on. This smile has a warmth that could melt even the sharpest of icicles in Briggs. ]

Sukuyo Mankanshoku! [a smile, and a quick little bow.] It's very nice to meet you!

The pleasure is mine! If you need my assistance for anything do not hesitate to call! [ Armstrong will protect small children everywhere 5ever. ]

I will! But, if you need the services of a housewife, be sure to call me as well! [Someone has to mend all those ripped shirts!]

I have learned very well not to underestimate the power of housewives. [ Housewives are special this I know, cause Izumi taught me so.... ] What type of talents do you have as a housewife?

Oh, just normal things! Cooking, cleaning, laundry, turning everything I touch into a croquette...

[beat]

That last one is new.

[ Yo that last one kinda makes him a bit uncomfortable. Like, seriously... ]

Do you have to do that consciously? Does this skill even apply to people? [ Like, how scary would it be if you were minding your own business and worked hard for hella years of your life only to be turned into a pastry at the touch of a girl. ]

I don't know! I've done it by mistake a few times, but I've only ever used it on things I usually make croquettes out of... [So, fish. Dirt. Small mammals. A brick.] I've never made croquettes out of people.

I don't think even I could make that taste good.

Well, that's not the point of me asking that question. I think you should hone that skill! Think about how you'll be able to protect yourself. You can grab their sword or wrist and turn it into croquettes. You don't have to worry about other people eating them or making it taste good. [ He smiles. ] You're just using your housewife talents to protect yourself and your family, and that has to be a skill of a housewife, right?

I hadn't thought about it that way... [And she hadn't. Making croquettes you wouldn't eat? Madness. But, she sees his point...] Yes, I could use my croquette powers to fight off evil, just like everyone else does! That way, Mako won't have to do it by herself!

That is right! Mako wouldn't have to do it by herself but make sure you still work with others, all right? If it can be helped, you can always count on me to protect you. [ Because, adorable helpless civilians are his favorite.. ] I can also teach you some martial arts, or maybe use alchemy to fashion you a weapon if you wish! But I'm afraid I can't teach you how to wield the weapon; you'll have to find someone else to do it.

Ah, would you? [Martial arts, wow!]

[... Waaaaaait.]

Alchemy...? I thought that wasn't real. [You know, like lead into gold. Magic.]

Maybe not in your world, but in my world it is something that exists and is perfectly valid.

How interesting! [She really doesn't need much to convince her of the validity of weird shit.]
What sorts of weapons can you, um, alchemize?

If I find a sheet of metal I can punch, I can transmute it into anything. Hammers, knives, axes, spears, anything you can desire!

Wow. You could probably make a really nice skillet.

[Mind just immediately goes to cooking.]

I mean, if you want to do combat with a skillet I do not object but surely there are better weapons out there! [ ... girl, c'mon.... ]

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