☥1 (Video)

[ahappyending]

[The name on the ID says ???? | Didi. She's a young woman with pale white skin, dark hair, and a little curly-cue underneath her right eye that doesn't seem to be just makeup. Basically, she looks super Goth.]

Ever have one of those days where you're feeling a lot more mortal than usual? Mortal-ish. Maybe that's just me, though.

But this is exciting! New place, new people, a new history I haven't seen before. Every time I think the universe is running out of surprises... well, it's no fun being right all the time, is it? There's something new waiting around every corner like a pony ready to pounce.

So! So, so, so! Figure I'll pick everyone's brains. What's your favorite part about being here? I have two already, and that's the two flavors of free malts they were giving out at that cafe place. But that can't be all, so I want to hear what the old-timers have to say.

Oh-- call me Didi, if you want. It's a cute name, don't you think?

[AUDIO]

[weapabilities]

My friends, after learning about the holidays you celebrate on Earth, participating and doing some reading, I have been wondering...

The holidays are all about family and loved ones. Tell me, who are the valuable people in your life? What is important about them? How do they bring you peace? Are they a friend or related to you somehow? Are they here, or are you missing them?

Please, share with me your fondest thoughts.

video

[booyahh]

[ When Traci comes on the video screen she's got a bright smile on her face and a pair of sunglasses propped on top of her head.]

So far I give this place a 5 out of 10. It's a definite improvement over the last quasi-alternate dimension I ended up in. Free housing is pretty nice too. [ Those are the main positives she's seen so far. ] The whole registration thing is docking some major points, so is the potentially being permanently trapped here thing. [ Potentially. It's said as if she doesn't fully buy it.

She twists her face up in to a mini scowl. She's not actually mad here, just slightly annoyed. ]

The file on me was also pretty creepy. I docked a point for the creep factor there. Where do those even come from? [ And who all has access to them? She lets out a sigh and then pauses for a few seconds. ] I'm also taking points off for the job. Magic: The Slathering body cream --nope. That's a nope there. [ Nope forever to school too. ]

So, I could do this other ways [ magic ] but it looks like this is the normal way to say hi. And I can do normal, dad would be so proud. Anyway, hi. [ She waves. ] I'm Traci Thirteen, though I think this thing already lists that part. I'm looking for any and all information people can give me about this place and about whose trapped here. I'd like to know as much as possible about the situation and the variety of people we have here. [ So that she can see what chance they have of getting out. ]

Oh, and hello to residents of Heropa [ she lets out a little snort, this place is seriously called Heropa? ] number 5. Looks like we're going to be roommates. I promise it won't be too weird. [ It's probably going to be pretty weird, sorry. ]

01 | text

[deadtective]

[ah, thank god this thing has a text option. Hazel is leery of even putting her voice out onto this network - she really doesn't want any way to be more identifiable than she absolutely has to be. perhaps it's a little paranoid in the company of other...less than normal people, but she can't help it. somehow she doesn't think even imPorts would look kindly on a zombie.]

So, this is...fantastic.

There's probably been a lot more creative complaining on here than I can dish out, so I guess I'll skip that for now. Maybe I'll come back to it when the next catastrophe hits? Who knows.

Anyway. How exactly do I pump these nanowhatevers out of my body? I refuse to believe that people have been here like, what, a whole year? And they've all been fine enough with that kind of stuff floating around in their body to not do anything.

I mean, it's not like they get taken out when you decide to unregister, right? So there's really nothing stopping them from forcing you to help anyway.

Is there something about all this that I'm missing? Am I just nuts? Does this universe jumping render you temporarily insane or something??

[wait no shit she's spiraling into anxious paranoia THAT'S NO GOOD GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF GIRL]

So. Yeah. I'd appreciate whatever help you can give me. And I'm going to need video proof of any suggestions that're especially stupid - I don't really have the patience for pranks right now.

★ 001 | Video

[unbreaker]

[When the broadcast begins, the young man onscreen (sporting a perfect pompadour with not a single strand of hair out of place) tucks away a comb and reclines upon the front step of one of the government houses, presumably the one he's been assigned. He seems to consider for half a second more what he's going to say, one eyebrow cocking upwards, a strong indication that there's a question brewing, while his lips pucker in a vague showing of frustration.]

Alright...

[Here we go.]

So, I'm digging all the free stuff that people seem to wanna hand out in exchange for photographs with us and whatever, and the hoverboards are really, really awesome. That said, I might actually like these new phones even better, though? They're pretty great! Slim, stylish, lightweight...pocket size. Anyway, all that's nice, but something's been bothering me and I've gotta ask...

What the actual fuck is up with these glow-in-the-dark tattoos?

[His jaw sets stubbornly, blue eyes fixating on something that lies out of view of the camera. Probably the tattoo in question.]

I mean I know what they're for, or what we're being told they're for, but like...

Shit, is this even legal?

[Actually, he's a hell of a lot more concerned with the fact that he wasn't even asked if something could be done to his body, especially as he can't fix it. Talk about invasive. Makes a guy wonder what else was done without his knowing.]

And on that note...I'm kind of curious about this whole registration deal! Anyone got a solid argument for it or against it? 'Cause right now I'm right in the middle and uh...from what I hear, that means my roommates can put me out?

What kind of asshole would do that, though?

Anyway, that's it. That's all I gotta say!

[He reaches forward as if to turn the device off but stops.]

Oh, and the name's Josuke! [Best to get it out now so he's not repeating it a hundred times later.] Josuke Higashikata!

[Click!]

2 - text

[lackey]

[Approximately one month ago, Mike Parker posted his first entry to the network. And then he up and disappeared halfway through responding to said entry. How rude of him.]

i take it back . all fo it. all the stuf i said bout the gov. or implyd bout the gov. takin it all bak. ofishaly. ok ? u need 2 kno the gov is great. the gov our gov is the vry best gov out of all the govs. at lest all govs in this world. cant judge all govs in univrs dont kno em. mayb there beter mayb just horible & mean & shity.

like mayb if u got kidnaped ( & im usin that word nicely the kind of kidnapin our gov does is cool its 4 a good cause everybody knos that ) by sum gov on anothr world ud get a glowy tat sum place uncomfortabl. wrist isnt bad at all. way beter than u kno. use ur head, think bout that 1.

but yea. i was wrong. usas gov is awsum. sure theyv screwed sum ppl over in the past but theyve changed & dont do that anymore. & they dnot have secret groups or any othr secrets cept mayb smal ones but everybodys got smal secrets. smal secrets make the world go round. its fine.

lov ur gov ok. i kno i do.

so can anybody explain 2 me how its jan when it was just dec cuz it was just dec & now its jan.. jesus.

or! if anybody knos any hero clases u can go 2? i could use sum lesons on this stuf. gona serve my gov! just need a litl help getin started.

thnx

video;

[ahanalyzing]

[The girl on the screen clearly knows she's recording, despite the fact she's just staring into it silently...it goes on for a few seconds. Kind of awkward actually.]

...powers are interesting.

[Her tone is...lacking. Literally, that is a total monotone she's got going on.]

But...give and take... unacceptable.

Property of team magma. Unauthorized acquisition absolutely... assuredly... forbidden.

So return it.

[A beat.]

My pokémon. Return it to me.