maskormenace | Entries tagged with † magnus chase

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

Mask or Menace is a panfandom urban 'superhero' genre DWRP game, where heroes, villains, and everyone in between seek to survive and thrive in a world loosely parallel to our own.

d33tached

Have you aseen thsi?

[Insert one blurry picture taken of a TV screen. It's hard to tell what exactly D33's watching, but--]

hoem shoppgin network.

Honeslty, why do es anyone leave theri house? You can evne buy weaponry.

[He turns on his camera then (which he could have just done in the first place), and uses it to zoom in on a set of brightly-colored kitchen knives that the salesperson is currently featuring. A heavily drunken voice slurs behind the camera:]

Incredulous.

[Wait.]

Incredible, I mean.

Obviously.

[There's a pause. Who is he talking to again?]

Goodbye. [The feed goes black.]

mortalweapon

[ If you recognize the setting of this video post, you're probably either a cop or you've been in trouble with cops, because this is the Maurtia Falls police department. More specifically, it's a holding cell — whose occupants are a tall blue robot, a small nervous Darkov, and the evening’s host of troublemakers, which includes a hot dog mascot passed out on the floor and a man in nothing but a feather boa and his boxers. ]

I am aware that Martin Darkov has multiple ImPort guardians.
At least one of which is a police officer with the Maurtia Falls Police Department.
So perhaps it would be beneficial for one or all of these individuals to come down to the station promptly.

[ For her part, Danger is as calm and cool as she ever is. ]

I explained to the officers on site that, given the circumstances, I caused strategically minimal damage to “Freddie’s Fear Farm.”
And I did, in fact, warn the zombie pony.

fehus

[a placid Kurt Cobain impersonator on your feed; he's had a rough month, but right now he's looking resolved, at least. he's sitting with his knees up on a pretty autumnal overlook in the Virginian mountains, hands curled around his first Pumpkin Spice Latte of the season. the cup, tilted just enough towards the camera, reads, "HAGGIS"]

Um. For people who didn't know. Laura Wilson -- um, Persephone -- she's left. Gone home. Whatever.

[for a good 30 seconds, it seems that's about all he's figured out to say, grey eyes sort of deer-in-headlights looking. then he blurts] And she's kicking ass in floral leggings wherever she is, so I don't want a bunch of sympathy about it. Or people saying sorry. It'd be better if you left me an irreverent tweet or vlogged at me about eating ass. Actually, I'm requesting it. That's what she'd want her legacy to be.

[he rubs at his face, which has gotten kind of flustered despite himself]

Uh. And I guess I'm a Co-Prince of Hel now. Just in time for Halloween. Which -- is something. Uh. I've got some plans for it, once I get the place more cleaned up. The plans don't involve cool concerts or divine grief counseling or rockstar orgies. Sorry. I'm throwing all those couches away. But I'm -- I'm gonna do something good with it. [he amends] I'm gonna try to, anyway. Something she'd like.

Watch this spooky space, I guess.

[he sips his latte, and after a moment, adds]

And if you left stuff in Hades besides weird stains and good memories, let me know. I'll mail it by cave bat. Cheaper than Fedex.

calloused

[ introductions are for losers, so Derek doesn't include one. just gets right down to what he wants. ]

Started a business. Hiring people. Tell me if you need a job.
Full time or part time positions available. Branches are located in Heropa or Maurtia Falls. Be nearby, or at least willing to travel.

Requirements:
- Unaffected by blood, bones, etcetera.
- Capable of dealing with emotional turmoil.
- Stamina in spades.
- Likes animals.
- Not an asshole.

That's it.

[ that's it. no further explanation. no sympathy for anyone dealing with roomba drama. zero shame ]

pocketfulof

So...[He has a feeling he's turning into one of those "bloggers". He only seems to post when he's practically speaking into the void. Oh well.] Why are there so many weird "holidays"? Apparently, this past Wednesday was Techies Day, Virus Appreciation Day--I'm not so sure about that one--National Kale Day, and National Boyfriend Day.

Uh...happy belated day on that one Nico?

The rest of the month is the same too. I checked..

I guess, what I'm asking is...what's the weirdest holiday you've seen or heard of?

choosetruth

[Georgia has settled into her room in Nonah #004 with her no nonsense approach. She's removed the lightbulbs from her room and replaced them with black lights. She's been hesitant to actually talk to her roommates save for abrupt greetings. She's settling in. To the extent she's ever been interested in settling.

And now, she's finally ready to actually introduce herself. Or at least, ready to start talking. She's wearing her usual sunglasses and scowling down at an open folder.]

Gossip Magazine Writer. Someone here is either very stupid or has a mean sense of humor.

[She looks up, glaring through her sunglasses.]

I'm Georgia Mason. [The inflection makes it clear she's used to the name being recognized.] I am a co-founder and Editor in Chief of After the End Times. I have been reporting on Senator Ryman's campaign since it started. I have uncovered goddamn conspiracies and tore down lies. I have been my own boss since I was old enough to type and I am do not give a shit about who's wearing what or who's fucking who!

[She punctuates her statement by slamming her fist onto the table which... breaks under the force. She blinks. Sure, she read her file and knows this strength thing is a part of her now, but knowing and expecting it are different things, it turns out. She flattens her hand self consciously and looks back at the camera.]

...which is to say, I suppose, that I'm in the market for a new job. Anyone hiring?

pocketfulof

Between FanPort, and this whole deal with space and...everything that was summer...Anyone ever feel the greatest need for a nap? I'm talking epically long--one meant for the fables.

[It's late. Will honestly should be in bed by now, but he's surrounded by scattered notes and what is most likely his third or fourth cup of coffee. School does things to a man, okay?]

I'm looking forward to the "extra" hour from Daylight Savings Time...but I feel like most of us could use a month or two. Maybe animals had it right with the whole hibernating business.

[And welcome to the stream of consciousness that only a child of Apollo could produce.]

leyed

I was wondering if there's any driving schools around here? Or if anyone is willing to teach me how to drive? I can pay with money or amplifying your powers with my powers.

[ pause] Before you ask, no, I'm not going to ask Ronan Lynch, I'd prefer to learn how to drive properly.

areou

Listen up, eyes forward. ( which may or may not be easy to do, considering the sheer amount of guns in the background. they range all sizes, all shapes. whatever kind of gun you can think of, it's definitely there. she's even leaning against a glass case that is also full of guns. )

Carl's gone, so I'm stuck running his stupid store. ( she says like it's an inconvenience, even though she does enjoy it most of the time. ) Stock isn't a problem, obviously, and I'm the most qualified to solicit weapons advice, but now it's just me and I occasionally have better shit to do.

( not necessarily true. she just hates to admit why she's bothering to appear on the network again. she hesitates a bit, because she's a stubborn asshole. )

If anyone's willing to enlist their services around here, let me know — doesn't matter whether you like guns or more medieval armaments. I just need someone to crunch the numbers and all that shit, be here when I'm not. I pay cash or I can conjure you as many custom weapons as you want.

( speaking of, she turns the camera to the other side of the store, which now sports a plethora of medieval weaponry: spears, swords, daggers, the occasional mace and ax. it's whatever clarisse has felt like conjuring and then didn't want to keep. )

This is just a small selection of the shit I can make. ( the camera turns back to clarisse. ) Hell, I'll fight your fucking battles for you as long as you agree to watch the store. Any takers, you know how to reach me.

facilitainted

[Hey look, it’s a small black cat? On two legs? …Smoking?]

So. This is the future. No horses, lemons everywhere...

[What a deep voice from the cat!! He sucks in a deep puff from the cigarette, and exhales a cloud the size of himself while leaning up against a parked car.]

Really digging how you’ve made old viruses even stronger over time. And all the extra chemicals you’ve added to these?

[He holds out his cigarette again, wiggling it back and forth.]

Choice work, guys. You humans are so good at self-destruction, it’s almost like I don’t need to be around! But now I’m here anyway, so. Let’s get this party started!

Oh, and I guess I should ask. Anyone know of a girl named Bean? No? Yeah, didn't think so.

setmatch

Well, now that the election hubub has died down, I suppose now is as good a time as any.

Mr. Anderson and myself have opened a law firm in Maurtia Falls.
We are currently seeking some employees- filing clerks, legal aids, etc.

This is also a general call for anyone interested in joining or supporting the imPort Lawyer Association, which has the blessing of Mayor Baelish to be established in Maurtia Falls.

Furthermore, while our legal library is small, it is open to any imPort who wishes to browse or borrow.

rebelhealer

[Anders is sitting on his couch, holding the device up to his face.]

So, I've been doing some thinking over these past few months. Last month a lot of people got hurt, and I'm actually a spirit healer. So, I was wondering if there's any free clinics who could use a volunteer healer.

[It feels weird, announcing his talents like this, and telling the public he's a mage. But by now he's realized that he's not about to be hunted down and arrested just for being different.]

hellraiser02

Hi. Quick question, network.

( Picture under the cut for pagestretch )

Why do I have this saved to my harddrive? Thanks for your time.

blackfly

Hold on, slam the breaks and put your finger on the rewind button here for a second because okay. Okay? Okay. I can kind of believe in the whole bestowed with supernatural abilities things for reasons (which we need not get into,) but like - it's the interdimensional travel that's getting me here. I'm - I'm seeing names? I'm seeing names. Certain names. And I can't be the only one who sees these names and feels like I'm freaking out just a bit. What do you do when you meet your idols? Didn't someone say you should never meet your idols? Oh my God. I can meet my idols.

Getting back on track. Dimensions. Multiple. Crossing? Sharing. Hyperventilating. No speaking of bikinis.

How is nobody else freaking out? How are we all asking weirdly vague questions and not being like "Oh my God, I just saw [*Barney the Dinosaur] in Whole Foods"? (*Name changed to protect the identity of probable space smugglers, Crusaders in Capes and other miscellaneous HEROES and LEGENDS from my CHILDHOOD. Adolescence? And well, who am I kidding, a lot of my teen years.)

Am I hallucinating? I don't have six fingers so this can't be a dream. I'm not dreaming. This is real.

I also really really really really really think I'm going to need to know where to get an ADHD script filled now because I really really really really think I'm going to need it.

workingsnug

Gooooood evening -- [there's a slightly muffled exchange, as though he's holding his hand over the microphone. it sounds a little like "Hey! Hey, buddy! What's this place called again?" and then:] Heeeeeropa!

I've got just one question for ya, Heropa. And it is... Are. You. Ready?

[there's a deep inhale, before he bellows. this post is not recommended for users of headphones.] I SAID! ARE! YOU! READY!

Because. The Wulf has arrived! That's right. It's a surprise engagement, and I'm gonna make sure it's one that you never forget!

The mighty champion, the hero of New Meridian, the one and only! Beowulf! Will be taking on the first three contenders brave enough to challenge him! One night only, first come, first serve!

This kinda open call is a real one in a lifetime opportunity, so don't let it pass you by!

[he includes his current location; it's not even really far from the landing site, maybe a few blocks away from the provided housing. does he mean to come and spar with him? is he a rampaging madman that needs to be stopped? is he just an idiot? bets are now officially open!]

notgood

[Hello Network. Here's someone who hasn't changed at all in age!! Still a perfectly reasonable adult... well. Maybe, still just an adult. A well-dressed one, at the very least!]

Chauncy Anderson, here. Thank you everyone who’s been kind to me during my… adjustment period.

I was intending to announce that I’ve passed the bar exam on this version of Earth, and so I can officially offer my services as a defense attorney again, but…

[He glances behind him, as if looking to someone outside of the frame.]

There’s obviously other things going on right now. With so many ImPorts changing ages somehow— which I'm not even going to touch on how insane that sounds— there's even more children and minors running around than usual. The government's continued failure to address the endangerment of children happening here, I'm working to start a program to help counter that. I was hoping to ask for some adult volunteers and get a list of existing minors...

[And, a break in the professionalism, as he closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose;]

But now some of adults are minors, and the minors are adults. Some of which even forget being adults to begin with. So this will be put on hold, until this... passes? I don't know. Maybe this is just how things are going to go?

[That seems to be the extent of his ramble, and finally he sighs.]

...Also, side note, but I've seen several ImPort minors in the past few days try to get into bars with fake IDs. Give it up. No one's buying it. You look barely old enough to drive, no one's going to give you tequila shots.

legionnaires

Has it really only been a month?

[ He's contemplative as he thinks about what he wants to say. He wasn't going to talk about the memories hitting him like a freight train -- or how confused he was for the first day about why he was pulled back. He's just glad he remembers. Enjoy a familiar face on the network again-- though he looks older, and the mark on his face is new.

A lot of things are new. ]

Allura, Shiro-- are you still here?

[ There's a brief pause, before he continues. ]

This is Keith. Paladin of Voltron. Guess I'm back and, if I still have my job at the gym, I'll be resuming self-defense classes at Dawn of the Delts.

rekt

HELP WANTED

need daycare or baby sitter willing to take teenagers
idc where just away from my home
at least 2 maybe 4 depends how uppity they get

will pay either cash or equal value in child labor
to be picked up once theyre normal again

accepting applications now to be interviewed at [[ address to the Meadows in De Chima here ]]
murderers nutjobs and native stalker fans need not apply
experience + character references a plus
must be willing 2 endure bagpipes & teen sass

ty

compostabelle

hello good morning
i think the main problem
with
your planet is that
centipedes are so
so small
so small
so small
it would take almost three thousand to eat just one of you
which is
UNREASONABLE
please tell me what you think

best love,
the many wriggle

((OOC: warnings and opt-out))

unconchonable

you knoww ivve seen a lot a shit
probably a lot more than all you pink-skinned sacks a red swwill combined really
but i aint evver seen the sheer bloody AUDACITY that is needed to do the wwrong thats been done to me
like dont get me fuckin wwrong here bein on this dirtball of a planet could be wworse ivve seen and dealt wwith wworse and this pathetic lil planet aint shit
a swwim through a lake really
but wwas it truly fuckin NECESSARY that i havve to look like one a you hornless an finless ANIMALS
i mean i knoww you guys aint the type to be able to comprehend the dowwnright MAJESTY of wwhat a superior bein looks like let alone the shinin example of wwhat a kickass royal fuckin troll SHOULD be and all especially wwith those inferior sponges in your pans but talk about loww
if i find out wwhos responsible for this ill be sure to kick his spinal crevvice to your borin singular moon and then some
regardless i think im getting awway from myself here
i actually wwanted to see if there wwere any other trolls among you slack-jawwed creatures
or am i the only one to make it here
not that i really care either wway
just call it idle curiosity

MASK OR MENACE

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Entries tagged with † magnus chase | n/a

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

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othala | video ✺ an inheritance is like a double edged sword - i don't know what to do with either.

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