maskormenace | Entries tagged with † eridan ampora

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

Mask or Menace is a panfandom urban 'superhero' genre DWRP game, where heroes, villains, and everyone in between seek to survive and thrive in a world loosely parallel to our own.

versusseeker

[There sure is a lot going on right now, but there is also this going on right now, and Red has a safety PSA for everyone.

[He links an image, and then:]

its tru

[Followed by a selfie - Red's usual dead-pan expression, and Archie in the background with his head in his hands. They appear to be at the hospital.]

pidgewidgeon

Okay, so I have a question. [ Pidge is sitting at an outdoor cafe, people watching even as she address the communicator. ]

Why are there so many kids and teenagers around? I've seen a few adults but it's mostly been kids, and they appear to be without supervision for the most part. It's a bit strange to be honest.

Unless... [ She pales a bit. ] I'm not going to be in charge of any children right? I'm only 15. I'm way too young to have kids!

[ Before Pidge can truly begin to freak out chuffs can heard from behind her as Green makes her presence known. The robot moves into the camera's sights and sits down while staring at her human, the chuffs almost sounding like laughter. ]

Hey! You're supposed to be on my side Green! Why are you laughing at me?

[ The video cuts out as Pidge turns to argue with her rude space robot. ]

rexabcrystallo

[ The camera comes on to a man kneeling next to a dog in a park, holding the communicator at a selfie angle. The man looks Japanese, with chin length black hair and a thin beard, wearing casual, cheap clothes. The dog looks like a shiba inu, with grey markings breaking up the black fur on his face, like a malamute. He'swearing a green neckerchief and by all appearances is a very good boy.

So how has anyone dared to imply otherwise? ]

I've only been here for a few days, so I'm still getting used to how things are here. It's little things, for the most part. Maybe I was just never responsible for a dog before, or that some dogs just don't seem like the type to need someone to be responsible for them. [ But mostly because it was someone else's responsibility, probably. His fiancee's, most likely. ]

Did you know that dogs aren't supposed to be out in the city without a leash? I don't know if that's just De Chima or all of this...America. [ That's the name, right? He gives the dog a good rub behind the ears. ] But it's a little counter-intuitive to tie down a messenger like that. Umbra here's a free roamer, he goes where he needs to, through whatever blockade is in his path. A leash couldn't stop him even if I wanted it to.

[ He smiles and rises to his feet, while Umbra perks up at suddenly being left out of the shot. ] I should introduce myself. I'm Noctis, and--

[ Umbra lets out a few barks from offscreen, which gives Noctis a startle. He looks down at the dog in surprise. ] What the hell?

[ The camera swings off him as his hand drops, then goes black. ]

unconchonable

you knoww ivve seen a lot a shit
probably a lot more than all you pink-skinned sacks a red swwill combined really
but i aint evver seen the sheer bloody AUDACITY that is needed to do the wwrong thats been done to me
like dont get me fuckin wwrong here bein on this dirtball of a planet could be wworse ivve seen and dealt wwith wworse and this pathetic lil planet aint shit
a swwim through a lake really
but wwas it truly fuckin NECESSARY that i havve to look like one a you hornless an finless ANIMALS
i mean i knoww you guys aint the type to be able to comprehend the dowwnright MAJESTY of wwhat a superior bein looks like let alone the shinin example of wwhat a kickass royal fuckin troll SHOULD be and all especially wwith those inferior sponges in your pans but talk about loww
if i find out wwhos responsible for this ill be sure to kick his spinal crevvice to your borin singular moon and then some
regardless i think im getting awway from myself here
i actually wwanted to see if there wwere any other trolls among you slack-jawwed creatures
or am i the only one to make it here
not that i really care either wway
just call it idle curiosity

glowsferatu

i need the name of every criminal defense attorney you can think of
thank you

heavyhitter

[ There are sounds in the background of this post remarkably like airport noises, periodic indecipherable loudspeaker announcements and a low general din of many tired, irritated voices. ]

Hey, know what I hate? People who disappear. That's fucking rude, right? There one second, gone the next. My roommates are off the hook for that, by the way, they all showed up again. Now the hook is aaaall Hisoka. I hope that asshole's proud.

So anyway. [ Some shuffling noises go here, as she rearranges unseen luggage. ] Looks like I got a something for a lucky someone! So, who wants to come to Vegas? All expenses paid! The only requirement is that you don't suck and I don't hate you. Also, less important, that you're either good at gambling or hilariously bad, I'll take either one.

[ and then in text, private to Nobunaga: ] this still counts i STILL WIN

unconchonable

[The feed turns on to show none other than Eridan Ampora leaning back from the communicator, obviously having just set it up on some surface before him. Since his ass is parked on the couch, it's probably a coffee table.

He looks serious, or at least as serious as a cape-wearing fish alien can look.]

Now that all that weird age bee ess an' other shit is outta the way for the most part, methinks it's time I make this little announcement. Consider it a PSA a' sorts. It's a matter of great importance.

[His eyebrow raises as he stares the feed down, allowing for a dramatic pause, before continuing:]

Upon showin' up here about a perigee or two ago, I came to the information that you humans got some system of non-gowernment when it comes to the waters of this planet. International waters, or some rubbish like that.

[A dismissive hand wave as he rolls his eyes.]

As such, the oceans of this shitty an' pathetic rock is left utterly unguarded, or ewen ruled ower for that matter. Honestly, it's one of the few things you human hawe done that's made any sense at all.

See--

[He leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees as his hands come together, fingers lacing.]

As the only suitable sea dwellin' royalty on this entire planet, I stake my claim of the ocean--of all the bodies of water, actually. It's only right that someone such as myself inherits this world's aquatic reserwoirs.

[He's absolutely 100% serious here too. Which, probably makes this worse, considering he's making this on April Fools Day of all days. Not that he's really aware of that holiday.]

That bein' said, as the new an' rightful ruler of the seas, there's gonna be some laws you landcrawlin' sacks a filth need to follow.

[He reaches next to the communicator, pulling up a sheet of paper. Look at that. He wrote it down, this shit is absolutely offishal now!]

First of all, no more stinkin' sweaty pink-skinned animals in my waters no longer. You do enough as is to pollute the planet by existin' on it with your foul presence, don't need that sorta scum muckin' up my waters. Second of all, no more slaughterin' a marine life without direct permission from the Emperor of the Ocean-- [His gaze goes from the paper in his hands to the feed, eyebrows lowering.] --that's me, if you hawen't been payin' attention. The ocean is my killin' cauldron, an' it's high time you shorewalkers back the fuck off.

Last, but certainly not least: no more ships, boats, or any such garbage in my oceans. Trespassers will be prosecuted by the New Nautical Aristocracy, ay-kay-ay, myself, an' you will not see mercy for your transgressions.

[He places the paper back down, resettling in his seat. Trying to look aloof and intimidating all in one go, but when you're the equivalent of a 13-14 year old human, you just look like a ridiculous tryhard.]

If you got concerns, questions, or whatewer, I'm feelin' generous enough to entertain them, an' if there are any other sea dwellers I ain't aware of on this planet, feel free to contact me an' I'll see what I can do to work you into my new kingdom, we sea dwellers gotta stick together, after all.

The rest a' you, naysayers an' what hawe you, kindly piss off.

[And without further ado, he leans in to turn off the feed.]

ahappyending

[To those who know 'Didi,' you might be surprised by the angry look on her face, or the cold, clipped tone in which she speaks.]

I've put up with this indignity for far too long. To try and trap Death herself in a fragile sack of mortal flesh... it's greater foolishness than any of you could possibly understand. The chaos your impertinence and ignorance threatens to wreak on this world is beyond your comprehension.

There will be consequences, keeping me here.

(ooc: Welcome to Death from three billion years ago! She's cold, she's harsh and she's a far cry from the kindhearted Didi you all know and love.)

chrysalust

[A shirtless boy of about twelve appears on the screen, eyes bright gold, lips puckered in a smirk below a light amalgam of freckles dotting his nose and cheeks. Familiar to some but it might become a lot more apparent who it is once he speaks.]

How long do you think I would be able to manage dealing in my casino like this, hm~? [A chuckle, the boy's tone sly- sultry. A tone a twelve year old really shouldn't have, Hisoka'a voice definitely higher than his usual but pulling in the same seductively coy way it always has.]

[He glances down, inspecting his hands unseen off the video. While this is certainly strange and he'd like to know why the hell he's this age again, it is a bit entertaining.]

Mmm... Will flirting at this age become cute now? What do you think I could get away with saying? I certainly have to continue to please my players.

[Another pause before he switches to text.]

but i definitely think emoticons like this r much cuter being used by an adorable boy

o u o

crabsurd

FIRST OF ALL: FUCK YOU AND FUCK THIS.
GRUBNAPPING. OF COURSE! SO "ORIGINAL." I AM SO STUNNED BY THIS DISPLAY OF CREATIVITY AND GOOD SENSE THAT MY ASSORTED SHOCKBLADDERS HAVE GONE INTO OVERDRIVE. IN FACT, I - WAIT, YES - HERE IT GOES. YOU WIN. YOU FORCED THIS OUT OF ME:

O:B
( cut for more capslock tl;dr )

capriciousrevolt

[ The video shows Ash's face from a rather distinctive selfie sort of angle. Briefly, he brings up one hand to wiggle his fingers at his audience. When he speaks, his accent is distinctly French, ] Good evening, all you people desperately in need of serious therapy. I'm new here, and starting to come up with some personal theories about my situation. Did I die? Is that it?

Since I'm in random alternate dimension America, it must be that I've died or my promoter betrayed me terribly since there's so many gauche, noisy examples of humanity around. I'm in my own personal Hell, and it's unfair because I really didn't deserve this.

Heh, maybe. There's nothing to be done at this late date. 'Burn it all down' doesn't seem like much of a solution. We're the good guys here. [ Laughing like he thinks he's funny, he idly toys with his hair. ]

Down to business. Entertainment. I'm in the market for it. Off the books would be interesting, but nothing illegal. Favorite bars, best restaurants, no holds barred underground fight clubs... whatever. I just don't want to be bored. No one wants me bored.

databoner

[Oh look, a new post on the imPort communicator! Although this time, there seems to be no ID attached to the post, it's entirely anonymous. It's pretty late at night on the 25th, surely some people will be up.]

Heroes.

How safe do you really think you are?
( Warning: Picture heavy under the cut )

[OOC: Aaaand Inumuta is currently infected with the Hornet's Mind Clone of Miguel Rodriguez right now! So he's not exactly himself at the moment. Right now, Inumuta's doing the whole anonymous schtick, but if any hackers/people capable of tracking him down do any digging whatsoever, they'll find him. He's intentionally not covering his tracks as well as he could have because as a Hornet, he isn't shying away from any jabs he can get at Imports.

So, action is possible, but please try to coordinate with other players in this! Feel free to threadjack, whatever!

Side note: Please forgive my typos, and I'm sorry for the poor choice in pictures for some characters, if I used a picture you don't like and want a new one, send me a link. Also also, I will update this post with a few more characters once I hear back from a few people to get their final approval from my plotting post.]

malodorous

So... Do a lot of people here believe in ghosts? And, if they do, shouldn't they want to leave the ghosts alone?

I mean, I guess it would be hard to tell what's possible and what's not in a place like this, and I'm just not sure that gawking at potential spirits is a safe pastime. It might be fine for people that are only going to do the rounds once, but if I'm poking around them every night, they're going to learn my face and stuff. You probably don't want ghosts to think you're some kind of annoying jerk, right?

... Of course, it's also perfectly possible that they're not real. If that's the case, though, why does a 'Ghost Tour' business even exist?

Well. This world has a lot of a strange jobs, so maybe it's as simple as that, and maybe I don't have room to complain so long as I'm getting paid. Riding around and telling people stories isn't a bad gig, either, huh?

I dunno'. I just thought it was weird. [ Aaaaand, now he's not sure why he's here or how to end this. Ghosts? Jobs? Yeah. ] Um. Bye, then?

nooneexpects

Bear with me, but this is insanely fascinating. The way this whole thing is set up in the bathroom. I can-- I can have a bath whenever I want. A hot bath! In five minutes! I could bathe every day. This is revolutionary!

And in the same tub, I can make it rain. Hot rain, even. I have my own personal waterfall.

The technology in this world is impressive. I wish I had more words to convey that because-- well, you know, hot waterfall.

tadeadshi

[The name that shows up on the entry is "Tadashi" because you better believe he's not taking chances in a place like this. Optimistic? Yes, absolutely. But not risking safety and trying to keep the whole 'internet safety' role model in tact is something else. Besides, he'd never hear the end of it from his little brother if Hiro saw him posting to this network with his full name. So yep, another one that hacked his user ID settings.

There's a fairly substantial pause at the beginning of the recording while Tadashi tries to suss out the buzzing in his head and how to word his question without being too obvious. He eventually sets the device down on the desk in front of him, making his voice sound distanced a bit.]

I could use some input on something if anyone could help. Best non-destructive pranks while snowed into your own house, what've you got?

[He hasn't forgotten that dare Hiro made Lana do or the cheap snowball shot in the yard. It is on.]

unconchonable

so i gotta say this is a bit different than wwhat im used to but this clunky piece a shit seems to be wworkin noww
evven if its stupid autocorrect function keeps tryin to fix my quirk
shitty pain in the ass piece a trash human technology
guess ill deal wwith it for noww
ANYWWAY this aint wwhat i wwas expectin to see on the other side of the transportalizer especially after uhh
wwell nevvermind
that shit aint any a your lots business
i suppose this is a better option in SOME case than wwhat i might havve had back wwhere i came from
still aint too keen on howw the wwhale gibberish fuck i wwas evven brought here proper
i mean sure there wwas that siltsucker that laid all the deets on me about this horseshit but i wwasnt exactly LISTENIN cuz honestly wwho givves a fuck about that nonsense
except i guess noww i do since im wwonderin about it
wwhatEVVER

THAT BEIN SAID
i doubt im the only one of us trolls wwho got taken here unless im some special case
that a wwhich i wwouldnt be surprised considerin wwho i am but i digress
i imagine itd likely be one a you that are still breathin
or otherwwise aint sufferin holes in your personal torsos
so come on showw yourselvves i aint got all night
or i guess i do but i really rather not wwait for your cowwardly asses to muster the courage to speak the fuck up
so come on wwho a you are skulkin around these wwaters

jirk

So. It's come to my attention that we are like-- [he squints off-camera for a moment] three days away from Valentine's, and I've only got two questions: Where's the party, and who's in the market for a date? For the record, I am a Capricorn with exceptional taste in music, poetry, cars and alcohol.

[-- a slight pause.]

And, I mean. Come on, look at me.

[The most ridiculous, devil-may-care grin imaginable. Hear ye, hear ye, ladies and gents, Jim Kirk has the floor. But after a moment it fades and he clears his throat, going back to 'business', so to speak.]

Name's Kirk! Friends call me Jim. I'm new, but don't worry about the welcome wagon. Got that sorted out on my own. My kingdom for a good hamburger.

[And with an airy little wave, he disconnects.]

[ooc; 4th walling info for the curious!]

welcome

[Cecil's had a rough couple of days. The giant bird attack wasn't pleasant, but hey. It happens. The near-drowning situation was a little more traumatic, but he's past that, too. He's trying to settle in.

Except -- he keeps hearing things. Seeing things. On the one hand, it's like being home again. On the other hand, it's terrible.]

Ah, hello, everyone.

[Still, he feels like he should introduce himself. For the time being, these people are his new community. If he wants to thrive here, he should get to know them.]

I hope you all managed to survive the recent holidays. If someone stole your heart, I hope you took it back and re-positioned it carefully within your ribcage. If you stole someone else's heart, you should return it. Or you should bury the heart in a cherry oak box; whatever your god slash cabal slash gardener demands --

[Carlos's voice suddenly echoes in his ears. The words are unintelligible -- something about stir fry or centrifugal motion -- but the abrupt, impossible nearness of his words makes Cecil falter.]

-- and, uh, at any rate! I'm Cecil, and I'm happy to be a compliant member of this program. If the American government requires me, then here I am. Proud to serve my country. Proud to be experimented on by my country. Proud to be detained without suggestion of release. By my country.

[His voice is deep, sonorous, warm. And, by all accounts, entirely sincere.]

It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance.

iampretty

[you can hear the ambient noise of a restaurant in the background.]

Well! Now that I've figured out how this device works, I should probably introduce myself. My name is Hans, Prince of the Southern Isles and fellow imPort. I've met some of you at the party-oh, let me just swap this to the video for a moment.

[And then, he fiddles for a moment and manages to turn the video on: Hans is sitting in what looks like a restaurant-decidedly not the Hard Rock Cafe (though the eagle-eyed viewer can catch the edges of the Hard Rock Cafe logo on his black work polo. He's broadcasting this from his lunch break.]

Is it working? It should be working. [He shrugs, waves at the camera, then clicks it back off, swapping to audio.]

Anyway, it's become more and more obvious to me that I know next to nothing about this land. So, I'd appreciate any knowledge about customs and traditions of America. I already know about your president, thanks to Nelson, but what about your courts, your military strength, what it takes to get married, things like that?

[why yes he deliberately picked that last topic, sorry not sorry Anna.]

Any information would be appreciated!

MASK OR MENACE

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Entries tagged with † eridan ampora | prince of hope

March 2021

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WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

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