maskormenace | Entries tagged with † luke castellan

March 2021

S	M	T	W	T	F	S
	1	2	3	4	5	6
7	8	9	10	11	12	13
14	15	16	17	18	19	20
21	22	23	24	25	26	27
28	29	30	31

WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

Mask or Menace is a panfandom urban 'superhero' genre DWRP game, where heroes, villains, and everyone in between seek to survive and thrive in a world loosely parallel to our own.

quaerit

[ Good evening, imports. Gansey's face is front and centre in this video. He's sitting at a desk of some kind, and the room he's in is large and predominantly wooden. Apart from that, few details can be seen. He's mounted the camera rather than holding it. His hair is attractively tousled and his expression is the kind associated with an address to the nation. ]

I wanted to thank you, all of you, who helped to bring us home. I don't think I can adequately express how good it was to see American soil again. I'm grateful for that, and to you. I know that many of you took great, personal risks on behalf of the captives. Thank you, truly, for all that you've done.

[ That sounded very solemn. It's nothing compared to what's coming, though. Gansey looks as serious as he's ever managed here, an expression that makes him appear far older than his years. ]

Unfortunately, I also have something to tell you. The Russian A.I. spoke to me in captivity. LACKEY's perspective was a useful one, but it was also disturbing.

Our lives here have been comfortable. The American Government has been welcoming, there's no doubt about that. I was always keen to play by their rules. I thought that asking us to Register was understandable. After all, we're essentially refugees, relying on their good will to have any form of freedom here. I Registered. I was happy to.

[ That's very much a past tense. He leans back in his seat, expression shifting just a little. He looks less polished, and more thoughtful; scholarly where he'd previously been political. ]

It's fair to say, the last week has given me ample time to consider that position. How LACKEY, and its Russian masters see us, was very clear to me. [ Gansey spreads his hands. He smiles slightly, careful and controlled. ] If Registration is intended to give us the rights of a citizen, it was roundly ignored. We were not foreign nationals, we were not Prisoners of War. We were not people, at all.

We were - are, in their eyes - no more than weapons, which they fully intended to use. It was the Russian view that the Americans have mishandled us, spoiled us, and that we are possessions of theirs.

[ His smile disappears, and his eyes hold a spark of anger. ]

I don't know what your feelings on that may be, but I can tell you mine. I have no desire to be a weapon in the Russians' hands. Neither do I have any intention to do the same for the Americans. I know that many of you are fighters. Many are soldiers, and for you, military action is second nature. That's not the case for everyone. We are not all fighters - but we all have powers, and my concern now is not just how the Russians wish to make use of us, but how this country will. It's clear that the power we have is desired by both sides. It's my opinion that Registration is going to mean fighting with, and for this country's military, and sooner rather than later - whether we would choose that, or not.

[ He thinks a draft is inevitable, in other words. If imports are such a valuable commodity to the Russians, they'll be just as much of one to the Americans. They are, to date at least, the only people in the world with powers like theirs. How long can the US really be expected to ignore that, if their enemies are already open about their intent? ]

That's why I can't support it anymore. I'm not saying any of this to frighten anyone. With all that's happened, I think you should know how we're seen, and make your own decision.

I'm sorry to end this on a sour note. I really am grateful to everyone who helped us, including the military. It's simply that, I wouldn't carry a gun. I certainly don't want to be one.

maskormods

THE MAJORITY REPORT: JANUARY 10TH, 2016

GOOD TO BE SELFLESS
As seen initially on all major news networks, then on the RSS feeds of news sites:
The gala event of the season was sixty-five million years in the making. Sorry, that's 3.5 billion. The history of life on Earth was on display at De Chima, featuring appearances by some of prehistory's most famous faces. But it was a real, baby T. rex that stole the show, and the hearts of those present. Funds raised by the event benefitted SELF, a new organization providing help to non-humans.

HE'S GOT GAME
As seen on Lulzfeed, Rumblr, BlueTube, everywhere!:
Do you follow Agito and Hiro? Do you like twenty-four hours GAMING LIVESTREAMS? DO YOU SUPPORT CHARITY? Then good news! Agito and Hiro, technologically savvy imPorts, have already played to fundraise (a la Extra Life) on the 1st to raise money for the Heropa Health Clinic.

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE
As seen on reporting from national news television, international news cycles, newsprint, amateur BlueTube videos mostly of the green fog descending, botanists discussing the jungle that had replaced Heropa:
Crisis had struck dear Heropa on the day of January 2nd 2016. We thought we could at least have some relative peace in the new year but it only took one day before an incident struck. On the 2nd imPorts were alerted to another imPort causing trouble. What appeared to be a criminal running a rampage turned far worse. A heavy green fog would roll in that day and consume all of Heropa. Many of the citizens and some of the local imPorts were lost inside the fog but the fog was not the only unwelcoming and ominous thing that took place.

When the fog lifted Heropa no longer stood the marvel that we all knew. Instead a jungle took it's place and one can only describe it as a frightening sight. Clearly the work of an imPort had been at hand. Only but a few hours later did we receive a video that revealed the cause of the jungle landscape, one that we dare not show. In short, it had turned out that someone we thought a hero was merely wearing a mask to hide darker intentions. Many would know him as a sprightly character from fiction, one we all grew up with and loved, but instead has proven to be more sinister than we realized. His name, is Peter Pan.

Many imPorts gathered to the edge of the Jungle to thwart whatever spell he had cast and didn't return for four days. On the sixth of January on lookers outside of what could be considered Peter Pan's twisted Neverland saw a golden light spread out from the center of the jungle and like it had never happened, Heropa stood once more.

The locals who had been trapped in Neverland had this to say. "We were trapped, not just inside there but in our own heads. We didn't remember anything about ourselves, but this warped nightmare we were made to think we lived. I don't remember much of it but it was just horrible. The things I saw, the things I did..."
More people commented that it was like some mass brainwashing, that made them do Pan's bidding or worse: be his play things for his brainwashed mass. It can only be described as insidious. Formerly cursed witnesses had said some people had actually died inside the jungle, though the proof of that is still unclear. Ongoing investigations are looking into finding some of the missing people that were inside Pan's Neverland.

In related news, officials believe that in a string of kidnappings that have happened in Maurtia Falls was done by none other than Pan himself. Care takers of some of these children often commented that before the victim was taken they would often speak of a figure playing pan pipes, something that Peter himself is known for. There is no trace of these missing children yet but we are assured that they will be looking into this.

We are still looking from comments from the brave imPorts who thwarted such an evil but we remain here to ask; Where is Peter Pan now? Is he alive? Do we have to fear another curse?

OUT OF YOUR SIGHT
As heard on international air waves:
The girl that Moscow claimed to be Lachesis is now missing.

OUT OF YOUR MIND
As seen in the 24-hour national news cycle:
Moscow has been issuing threats against imPorts. They claim that unnamed imPorts have made attempts against the native human they claim to be Lachesis, and now they have finally succeeded in their plot. The Secretary of State to the US has issued this statement: "Moscow does not have Lachesis, and our imPorts have made no move against this fable. This is but base propaganda intended to spark tension."

But word from Moscow is adamant. ImPorts will pay.

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from PLUM to STYGIAN BLUE because of Pan's antics. Thanks, Pan.

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.

bindsthedead

[Sabriel's at her desk in RISE HQ. She's wearing her bells, armor, and a clean surcoat, and she's looking into the camera with a determined expression.]

Hello. For those who don't know me, my name is Sabriel, and I'm a member of RISE. We're a group of registered imPorts led by Major General Olivier Armstrong, and we're tasked with arresting and bringing to trial those imPorts that attack and endanger our community and this country's citizens.

( Cut for length )

I believe that's all. If you have any further questions- about what happened, or what's being done- you can contact me or any other member of RISE.

vorbarra

[There is a thin, angular man with dark neat hair and intensely focused hazel eyes on the screen. He clears his throat when the vid starts; he's had to swallow down his nerves and put on his calm political mask to speak. His accent is a gravelly, guttural sort of Russian, as if Russians went into space and were fast-forwarded a thousand years. Which they did.]

Hello. My name's Greg. I'm adding to your barrage of new arrivals. It's still very surreal to be here, if for no other reason than that I'm on pre-space travel Earth.

[He does look honestly bemused by that.]

I was wondering what the regulations are for obtaining jobs around here. They've assigned me one, but I was hoping for something... low key. Normal, menial work. [A quirk of his lips.] I have experience putting in lights, if that's relevant, and as a navigator.

I was also looking for confirmation that all of the, ah, abilities listed in our files are real. I'd prefer not to test something like this to find out.

Thank you.

htespagheti

( If you want to read this entry without Papyrus font, it is HERE. If you would like to opt out of Papyrus font for your threads, it is HERE. )

YOU KNOW... I HAD NEVER THOUGHT OF MYSELF AS AN INTERIOR DECORATOR... BUT THE MORE I DO IT... THE MORE I AM FINDING IT MAY BE MY CALLING. EVERY CLIENT IS SATISFIED... I KNOW, BECAUSE THEY STARE IN SILENCE AT THE BEAUTY I HAVE UNLOCKED IN THEIR ROOM...

IT'S SO EASY! ALL I DO IS MAKE THEIR ROOM AS COOL AS I AM. A TRUE GENTLEMAN'S LOUNGE. WHERE YOU CAN PUT UP YOUR FEET AND RELAX. AND ENJOY THE EXORBITANTLY EXPENSIVE FIRE EFFECTS THAT I HAVE INSTALLED.

SO!!!!!!!!!!! I'VE DECIDED!!!!!!!!!!! TO OFFER........ A HOLIDAY DISCOUNT TO ALL OF YOU, MY FRIENDS! IF WE AREN'T FRIENDS....... BECOME MY FRIEND! 50% OFF!!!!!!!!! LIMITED TIME ONLY!!!!!!!!!!! (I DON'T KNOW WHEN THIS WILL END).

BELOW UNDER THE """CONTENT CUT""" I HAVE PLACED TWO OF MY LATEST SUCCESSES FOR YOU TO PERUSE! SEE IF YOU LIKE THEM! REMEMBER: PAPYRUS' DECORATING.

( look guys you click this at your own risk )

rathercommon

[ Here's Kitty, wearing a smile and giving a little wave to the camera. ]

Hullo. It's Kitty here. I was just thinking about how it's about time for us to get another wave of new people - and then I remembered how last December, we didn't get any, and then I realized that I've now been here for over a year and that was just mad to think about.

It's easy to focus on all the horrid things that happen to us here. Because there are so many horrid things - that's true. The war with the Soviets is just terrible, and sometimes you just want to take the President by his shoulders and shake him until he stops - and those groups that detest us, they've made things a bit hard at times, as well. [ There's a little sideways twist to her lips as she says that; that's a grotesque understatement from a girl who had quite the history with one of those groups that detest us. ]

But it's always easy to remember the bad above the good. That's how the human brain works, isn't it - it's designed to remember hurts so that it can avoid those hurts in the future, which isn't bad, but which means that we sometimes lose track of the fact that there is so much more kindness than cruelty in the world. So I was just sitting and remembering all the good that's come to me over the past year.

Because this year, in this world, it really has been filled with impossible goodness. When I first came here, I was so scared, but there were people who took me in and helped me and protected me until I got a little more courage. And now here I am. I've made so many friends, amongst them someone I thought was my direst enemy. I saw people whom I'd never done any good for - I saw them forgive me when I was cruel and wicked and spiteful towards them, saw them risk themselves to help me and to save me.

And I've lived amongst the people of this world, who have been so good to me. So good. I've made friends amongst them, too. I've been kept on at work when I really have been the worst employee, when I've been unreliable because of my other obligations. And we've been allowed to speak our minds, speak freely. We've been allowed to travel far and wide. We've been supported in everything we do, which is far more kindness than has ever been extended a group of refugees at any time in any world. We've lived at peace. We've lived well.

So -

[ She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. ]

I'd thought - if I could trouble you all - that we could spend a little bit of time, all together, remembering the good turns that people have done us.

Talk about whomever you'd like. Talk about the people who have been kind and helped us when they didn't have to. Talk about the wealth that is the other people we know here. And I thought we could talk about the natives, too - I was thinking I might put together a little something, a few quotes, that we could pass along to the natives of this world, so that we know that we appreciate them. Let's take some time to overcome our brains, and remember the good - focus on the good and remember how kind the world is to us. How well we live. How strong and brave and honest we can be here.

[ Translation: 'All of this is a somewhat underhanded but well-intentioned PR thing that will let me package some stuff to make the natives less furious at us in an ongoing attempt to avert all-out war between us and this world.' ]

Anyway. There's that, if you can spare some time. Oh, and, erm - come by Krakatoa, while I've got your attention. Best club in town, bar none. And the employees are simply gorgeous.

[ A quick, half-sheepish grin, and then she gives a little nod and waves her way off. ]

angelfire

[ Lucifer has been gone for a while, keeping out of the way, letting the dust settle where it will. He's also reconsidered his approach to speaking on the network, as is evident by the change in venue. No longer is his video framed in stunning stained glass windows representing wings, or some other extravagant fixture of his church; instead Lucifer lazes on a long burgundy couch, propped up on top of a gold cushion. There is, perhaps surprisingly, the sound of football being played in the background. ]

Consumerism is beautiful, isn't it? I mean, look at this-- [ He waved his hand off screen. ] --Hours of dedicated advertising space, selling you things you don't need, broken up with the occasional three minutes of two dozen men standing around talking in the corner of a field. "Family entertainment."

[ Lucifer only bothers to lift one hand to make his speechmarks. Afterwards, he tips his head, laying it sideways against the pillow. His eyes are lidded, keen, though they give the impression that he's rather tired. Maybe he is. He's been around for a very long time, and for those who've met him before it's not an old expression.. ]

Tomorrow is one of my favorite days of the year. They're discussing it on every channel, during every break. Black Friday. Only humanity would invent for itself a sale with offers that you would literally sell your soul for. It's adorable--and frankly typical. On Thursday you reach out to your family, thank God for his generosity, and the world for its bounty. And on Friday? On Friday you'd stomp them all into fresh linoleum just to get your paws on a new I-Pad for five percent of its ticket price.

But it's the holiday season. [ He shrugs and tips back up again, propping his chin on the cushion as he hugs it. His free hand rubs his chin. ] You're supposed to miss your family, aren't you, assuming that you aren't together. Or, I suppose if you have no family, then the people you're close to, or the people... [ A very slight pause. ] ...the people you've lost. We all have those, don't we? Some more important than others. [ He might be speaking to one or two people in particular, but the poking at the wounds is just so subtle. ] So, here's the question of the season: what are you thankful for? What do you miss?--oh, and most importantly, what would you sell your soul for? [ A slow, dangerous sort of smile. ] Maybe I can hook you up.

Happy Thanksgiving, America.

maskormods

THE MAJORITY REPORT: NOVEMBER 20TH, 2015

MERMADE FOR A SPINOFF
Since the groundbreaking NBSea "documentary" that illuminated how some imPorts are clearly merport spies, the younger, more hipster locals of Heropa have dedicated their weekends to making homage art by creating (and often starring in) live "mermaid" installations. The most popular is a performance piece called "Dipper in the Deep End".

LAUGHING ALL THE WAY TO THE BANKSY
As seen around Nonah:
Eleven painted portraits of Ambassador Urquhart have been witnessed around the city of Nonah with this quotation spray-painted across the subject's face. But is it... Art?

BUR LAPDOG
As seen on the gossip tabloid-turned-show TMI:
There's something in the air — and it's love! Rumor has it that Dr. Jonathan Crane has been seeing a special someone during his time behind bars. Speculation is raging as to the identity of the doctor's mysterious paramour, who our source would refer to only as "Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman"; however, what's certain is that the two had been engaging in frequent late night conversations and after hours "office visits" for some time before his incarceration. According to our anonymous source, she "likes dangerous men," a comment which our source punctuated with an exaggerated eyebrow waggle and, we quote, "wink wink." The source then provided this "artist's interpretation" of what a relationship between the two might look like.

How far back does this romance go? Will she stand by her man on the outside? Will the love of a good woman be enough to keep him from ending up behind bars again? And the burning question on everyone's minds: can a little Scarecrow be far behind?

HAVE A THREESOME
As seen in all imPort city newspapers, advertisement section:
MUSKETEERS INCORPORATED - Private Investigation and Security Services

Are you concerned for your safety? Have you been a victim of crime, and feel there is nowhere you can turn?

Musketeers Incorporated can help. We will provide loyal, personal security to keep you, your family, or your business safe. We pledge to provide you with high quality, reliable and truthful investigative results, where your confidentiality is guaranteed. When you are in need of assistance, our doors will be open. We will provide aid for import and native alike. To serve is our duty, and to defend you, our pleasure.

To avail of our services, or to inquire around working with us, please contact Athos, Porthos and d'Artagnan, c/o Musketeers Incorporated, De Chima.

BOOTYFUL
As seen alongside commercials during daytime network programming:
Meet your new trainer Norman! He's a powerhouse of hunk ready to booty blast your assets into fine, focused fitness! With legendary measures of experience and legendary measurements PERIOD, you can find him at any Booty Burn Boot Camp franchise located within porter distance of the imPort cities! Don't wait! Don't delay! Get off that couch and into Norman's capable hands RIGHT NOW!

SUGAR AND PUMPKIN SPICE
As reported by the TuffLuffington Post and conversed about on Bwitter:
The illustrious and astoundingly sweet Princess Bubblegum found the BITTERLY MISSED stolen Pumpkin Spice within a mysterious basement, perhaps by using her remarkable powers of deduction. The culprit was none other than... (dun dun dun) KLARION! Disdainful of his caper being discovered, the self-proclaimed witch boy had turned the many jars of looted pumpkin spice into a bunch of rats, spiders and lizards and sent them running throughout the neighborhood in order to get rid of tasty evidence. But of course, once the spell had worn off, the critters turned back into a pumpkin (spice). A lot of Pumpkin Spice. These missing spice jars have appeared all over Heropa in completely random places -- places YOU might visit! Alleyways, parks, the middle of the sidewalk, up trees, and -- in some unfortunate cases -- inside pipes! Thanks, Klarion. Citizens, remember this when it's time to write up your naughty list!

TO-FUR-KEY
As promoted on the website BlueTube:
After an imPort broke 5,000,000 BlueTube views the viral video is causing lots of heated debate amidst animal rights organizations, diehard carnivores, and lovers of cat BlueTube sensations.

OH LOOK, SOME RUSSIAN PROPAGANDA PROBABLY
As seen on national news outlets and national public radio:
According to Moscow-based Soviet scientists, the former interdimensional godlike force known as Lachesis has been reincarnated into the subconscious of a native child -- a native child who conveniently happens to be at an undisclosed location in Russia. US intelligence operatives doubt the veracity of this claim, calling it nothing but a ploy to stir imPort aggression and civilian panic. Lachesis has been silent since the second era of imPorts began in 2013.

CHAIN GANG ACTIVITY?
As seen on the local De Chima news station DCNUWS:
A section of chain link fence has gone missing at a local De Chima middle school. Authorities are confused as to why such a thing would be removed and baffled as to how.

Stay tuned.

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from EVERGREEN to SNOWFLAKE in response to everyone being so special. Yes, even you!

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.

microbrobotics

[ A rare video post for Hiro tonight - but then again, this is a rare occasion. He's already gotten past the initial crying phase, so he's just numb and a little blotchy more than anything else, but his voice still shakes a little when he talks. A plain bedroom backdrop, clearly from where he lives in Heropa.

He takes a deep breath. ]

Has anyone seen my brother Tadashi? He's - he looks like this - [ A picture of Tadashi flashes on the screen for a moment. ] - and I'm getting error messages from his comm. Nobody I've talked to has seen him and ...

[ His voice trails off to a whisper. He can't even get through a whole post without tears welling up in his eyes. ]

I just - I need to know, please. If anyone has any idea. I need to know he's still here. If he's not, then ... then he's ...

[ Ported out. And dead. ]

bad_in_latin

[ The video is blurry at first before eventually focusing in on a gentleman in suspenders and what can only be described as some kind of cowboy coat. Leather duster? Whatever. Despite the apparent old-fashioned getup, Mal looks relieved when he gets the comm to work. Feels relieved, in fact. ]

… Well. Least the comm tech’s familiar. Can’t say as I tend to send many messages out all public-like, but this seems t’be a special occasion.

[ And he is desperately grateful for that familiarity. He adjusts his suspenders a moment before putting on a neutral smile. ]

Evenin’. The name’s Malcolm Reynolds. Uh - Firefly captain. And since that likely don’t ring no bells, that’d be my spaceship. I’m guessin’ that ain’t something anyone’s seen hair nor hide of here, but I’d surely appreciate anyone who might have a thought to it. Don’t hardly seem fair for this so-called righteous governin’ force to go takin’ our property. Anyone else get stuck with that particular hand? Or any chance of there bein’ a chance it’s been stowed away somewhere hard t’find?

Because I surely get tetchy all land bound an’ all. Don’t hardly do me no favors to keep me out of the sky.

[ All neutral still - since, y’know, the government has to be listening in on this too. Wouldn’t do to advertise a break-in right up front. Just a good citizen wanting to not go crazy in a new world…

While he figures out how the hell to drop off the grid as fast as possible.

After a few choice conversations, he adds the following message: ]

Anyone know a good bar to get drunk in?

crapbearer

So, imPorts, what are your thoughts on destiny?

[ Max is in his work uniform for the Museum of Folklore, framed by the charming backdrop of a cramped break room, soda in hand. ]

Admittedly, I'm a bit of a lit nerd back home, and a lotta stories out there start off with a prophecy. Modern stuff, too, but even then it's usually in an old timey magical setting.

A little bird once told me destiny is equal parts chance, free will, and necessity. Prophecy, divination, time travel... has anyone back home dealt with that kind of stuff? Knowing what's supposed to happen before it does?

maskormods

THE MAJORITY REPORT: NOVEMBER 10TH, 2015

FOSTER THE PEEPLE
As seen in all local imPort city newspapers:
De Chima Animal Shelter seeks imPorts for fostering!
With local animal rescues expecting to reach capacity over the upcoming holiday seasons, the De Chima Animal Shelter is reaching out to members of the imPort population who may be interested in the companionship of a dog or cat, but don't feel that they can commit to long-term ownership due to unstable existences. Even a few months of a loving household can go a long way in finding our shyer shelter residents a permanent home! Some restrictions do apply, as the shelter cannot in good conscience allow imPorts listed as Criminal to volunteer as fosters.

GRUMPY CAT: HUMAN EDITION
As seen on BlueTube, USTube, and the popular clickbait website Fuzzfeed:
Have you seen it? Are you SWAG enough to have seen it? Don't worry potential cool kid, here's the home video from infamously handsome TV host Stan Pines that went viral over the weekend, creating this week's new internet sensation! Find out why this man has 12 PhDs but can't put on a sweater without being stabbed*!
*Video contains no actual stabbing.

NAIAD FOR TV!
NBSea has a BRAND NEW "documentary" airing 10:00 PM EST on November 10th! Following the frenetic fervor of their successful shark endeavors, the sharp teethed executives at NBSea have shifted their usual educational programming to something more of the popular consumption variety -- this means CONSPIRACIES. Or as NBSea will call it: conspiraSEAS! This evening's "documentary" offers the theory that not only do mermaids actually exist and the government KNOWS and is ACTIVELY HIDING MERMAIDS FROM YOU, but that in fact the following imPorts are UNDER THE SEA COVER MERMAID SPIES:
Kitty Jones
April Ludgate(-Graham)
Dipper Pines
Mewtwo
Jang Junseo
Hazel Lockwood
The Iron Bull
Lapis Lazuli
Ripley
Athos
Papyrus
Carl Grimes
Tobias Matthews
Agent Texas

The takeaway from the program is clear: approach these merPorts with caution and make offerings of raw fish to appease the creatures.

VOGUE GONE ROGUE
Nailed it!, the high-end fashion nail polish company wants to produce the first and MOST EXCLUSIVE imPort line OF NAIL POLISH. All proceeds will go to Nailed it! and their stockholders. The company is looking for ONE color suggestion per imPort in order to market that imPort's face over that imPort's personalized and stylish hue! Nailed it! will take any offer, literally just comment with a color and you will have your own thematic nail polish out on the shelves by Friday.

CODE SWITCH
The Homeland Security Advisory System has moved from BLOOD ORANGE to EVERGREEN in response to the unusually calm and perfectly normal activity afoot.

WANT TO SUBMIT TO THE MAJORITY REPORT?
The Majority Report comes out the 10th and 20th of every month. You may find details and submit here. The cut-off time is 12:01 AM PST on the 9th and the 19th for the corresponding dates.

laruetheday

[ The video feed clicks on and reveals an extreme close up of an extremely pissed off Clarisse, who scowls down at her communicator, messing with the various buttons. After a couple seconds, she figures out how to zoom out. ]

This is how people are communicating now? Seems like more trouble than it's worth, if you ask me.

[ Which nobody did, but too bad! She has bigger fish to fry, so to speak. ]

Whatever. Listen, if there are any teachers watching this, I'm just letting you know that I'm not going to be attending your stupid mortal school. So don't bother sending someone after me about that. You think I'm scared of your truant officers? Yeah, right.

[ The feed clicks off! … Then immediately back on. ]

Oh, but I'll do the job you gave me, though. Probably.

[ The feed clicks off! … And then on again! She's getting the hang of this thing! Kind of. ]

One more thing. Let me know where the best sword fighting arena is. If there isn't one, I guess I can hit up a gym, but an arena is better.

[ A FINAL CLICK, and she's gone again. Not even a thank you. ]

timeshares

[So shortly after the events of two idiots breaking into a military base. One of two said idiots finally gets enough mental dead ends on the questions that very expensive failure left them.

The kid looks quite a bit more peevish than the last time he took to a video addressing the network as a whole. And now seems to be taking to long sleeve shirts.]

So, quick riddle.

For those of you are familiar with the stories of Lachesis in this world, if she's not in the Porter, got any guesses as to who is?

((OOC: Both Nico and Luke will be answering this one!))

americanhustle

[A handsome, well dressed man settles in front of the camera. He adjusts his tie before speaking.]

My name is Napoleon Solo, and I'm looking for a bit of assistance.

As I'm sure anyone watching must have some experience with, I seem to be lost. Rude really, to give someone a job and then not tell them where to go to find it.

More perplexing though, is the magic I supposedly have. [His tone is dubious.] I'd be very appreciative if someone could help with that issue in particular.

If you have any words of wisdom, don't be a stranger. I promise I make excellent company.

hallowedhorcrux

There are so many talented residents.

Some of you have never had powers before. Some of you know your powers well.

I am curious about your beliefs.

Are you comfortable in your current situation? Could you use...focus? Speak. I will listen.

(He senses unease - the spark of something bigger. How deep does it run, city? How big can the serpent grow? He doesn't mind operating in the shadows - a singular entity - but the progress is always sluggish.)

vacationer

[Since her hotel hostage adventure had gone south, Lourdes has been laying low - not out of a desire to look repentant (she isn't, and she sees no reason why she should pretend that she is), but because she's been sulking. Her powers are gone, which is both horrible and a relief, and she's on probation, which she considers a joke.

But what she's most upset about is that it hadn't worked. She's not at all surprised that she'd been caught, and she'd always figured that it would happen eventually - but before that, when she'd been in the hotel with everybody, it hadn't done anything to make her happy, which had been her main goal in the first place. It hadn't been like Hearst Castle, or even the Horizon. It had been meaningless, just like everything else in the world.

She waits a while before turning to the network. She hasn't actually been planning to address this in any way - not to explain herself, and certainly not to apologize. But one evening when she's sitting around in her apartment, angrily glaring at the tattoo on her wrist, she fires it up and says something on a whim.]

It was for their own good.

[She has no idea how far news of the takeover has spread, or if most of the people who hear this will even know what she's talking about. That's okay. She doesn't care.]

perturbator

[The video comes in rather unfocused at first, until some noisy fiddling brings a pair of 80s style Air Jordans into view.]

There's probably other things I should be asking first, but I only have two questions right now. One: How's the weather in California this time of year?

[If this place really is different, the forecast won't be nuclear fallout. People will be there again. America might be whole again.

Quickly, the camera shifts to a small coffee table with several different newspapers strewn all over it, but with a DVD copy of Terminator 2 on top.]

Two: How the fuck do you rewind this thing?

rathercommon

So -

[ Okay. So this is some found-footage shakycam stuff right here. Kitty Jones is staring into the camera with eyes wide with alarm. Her voice is squeaky and nervous. Her hair is mussed. Her shirt is wet.

Don't ask how her shirt got wet. ]

So, erm, Billy and I were doing a little bit of a spell to make latrines self-regulating and it sort of went a little bit wrong and now toilets are sort of coming to life? So, erm - Oh, no, oh, look out, look out -

[ She swings around. The camera catches one William Kaplan, Center of All Magic In The Universe, with his hands lit up, struggling valiantly against a toilet that's pried itself up from its floorboards and is now clomp-clomp-clomping towards him on its base. With a flash, it's shattered into shards of porcelain; Kitty ducks, shielding her head. ]

Oh, not that one, too...

[ She turns back to the camera. ]

We - think that this magic is going to be radiating outwards. So everyone check your loo, but check really really carefully. I can come and undo it - if I touch them, they'll go quiet - but just be careful. Toilets, port-a-potties, outhouses, all of them, they're all hostile. Stay safe, and oh God make sure that you've flushed before you try to fight them, please make sure you've flushed.

[ ooc: So this is the post regarding the miniplot referenced here! Feel free to have your characters' toilets come to life. Kitty's warning is not completely correct: toilets will treat your character as they themselves have been treated. If your character has been neglectful of their toilet, doesn't clean, flushes cigarettes down it, buys super-cheap toilet paper, etc., then the toilet will be vengeful and wrathful. However, if your character treats their toilet well, keeps it clean and maintains it well, then the commodes will be as loyal and affectionate as golden retrievers.

Alternatively, have your characters' toilets not come to life because this plot is (as they say) very crappy. ]

timeshares

[The young man on the video feed gives the communicator a casual, easy smile, only interrupted by a ugly scar running down his face. He's leaning on one elbow and looks for all the world as if this whole situation is really funny.]

So, from what I'm getting we're here to save the world from another part of the world and all that. I'm not gonna knock that; it sounds like a good deal.

It's just, you know, the file left out something really important to the whole do-gooder atmosphere: a superhero name. I know. You're probably as shocked as I am. That's everything with franchise rights. There's action figures at stake here. Card games! [Checks something on another screen, quickly.] And ... donuts, apparently.

Not that I've got any great ideas, but I'll take suggestions if you've got em.

MASK OR MENACE

NETWORK COMMUNITY

Entries tagged with † luke castellan | n/a

March 2021

Links

WILL YOU HELP SAVE THE WORLD?

Entry #003 | Video

JANUARY 10TH, 2016

VIDEO

(backdated to pre-Pan plot -- also threadjack Miles in the comments!)

002 🍝 VOICE

video

Video; the wolf at your door

NOVEMBER 20TH, 2015

video

(no subject)

Act IV - [Video]

NOVEMBER 10TH, 2015

001 [] video

Video | 002

001 | Video

(T e x t)

★ 002 | audio

CHAPTER ONE

start of something shitty

Video | 001